You jokes
So, I was in the bathroom at school washing up, and this girl walked out of the stall and she was like, "Hey, can you make me laugh? I have been having a pretty bad day." And I was like, "Sure." I was like, "Come here." So she came over to me. I was like, "Girl, look at yourself in the mirror." And she started laughing so hard, and she said, "I'm so ugly."
Your friend walks up to you and shows you a picture of an overweight woman.
What would you rate this woman?
A 7.
Why?
Because 7 ate 9!
If I died and went to heaven, do you think I’d be friends with Prince?
The only thing that makes me want to stay alive more is the thought that Prince would hate me.
Roses are red, violets are blue,
I’m sorry you look like my old beat up shoe.
You're so poor, when you kicked a can, a man asked, "Are you moving?"
You're so poor, even the store didn't let you buy anything free.
Your hairline goes so far back, the dinosaurs saw it before you did.
At school, this gurl was like, "You're ugly!" And I'm like, "Gurl, your mirror cracks the moment you step in front of it."
What do you call a gay BBQ? LGBBQ.
"Rosex, why you search that?" Does it mean "Roblox sex?" Kid, stop!
You're so ugly you make Happy Meals cry.
What do women and screen doors have in common? The more you bang them, the looser they get.
How much you wanna bet you will not repeat my name out loud (at school/work)?
How do you make an emo jump? Tell him to go to the roof.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, Here's hoping you do too.
Did you hear about the Mexican emo band? They're called "Hispanic at the Disco."
What would you rather be, emo or handicapped?
Trick question, emo is a handicap.
The water in the shower evaporates before it reaches you.
I crashed into the back of a car at the lights today.
A really short guy got out of it and said, “I’m not happy.”
I said, “Well, which one are you then?”
When does a joke become a dad joke? When it leaves you and never comes back.