You jokes
Me: Spanish teacher, why do we need to learn Spanish?
Teacher: Because you might go to Mexico and start a job.
Me: Why would I want to sell drugs?
You twin towers because I'm tryna ram in you tonight.
How do you get Wacko Jacko to come inside your shop? Have little boys' pants half off!
What do you call a dog with no legs?
Doesn’t matter, it won’t come to you.
I'll never forget my grandpa's last words.
"Are you still holding the ladder?"
What do you call a Chinese man with one leg?
TY-WON-SHO
(Tie one shoe)
According to unofficial sources, a new simplified income-tax form consists of only four lines:
1. What was your income for the year?
2. What were your expenses?
3. How much have you left?
4. Send it in.
Roses are red, violets are blue, You make me pee like I drink tea, you make me go buzz, like becoming a fuzz.
It sticks in, but it goes to the bin, after its use, it will be reused, no it is not what your thinking its -~-(clay)-~-
Roses are red, Violets are blue, You look like Shrek, And you make me peck.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, I need your peach, and I'll torture you with a speech.
Roses are red... blood is too... I wonder how blood would look on you.
Russians think they are tougher than Americans. Here are some reasons for the Russians out here reading this:
1. USA was NEVER invaded!
2. USA never commits as many war crimes as Russia does!
3. USA made the first nuclear weapon so yeah shove that up your ass, Russians!
4. Our soldiers don’t rape kids.
5. We have more allies than you.
6. We are smaller but stronger.
7. Random civilians in the USA have stronger guns than Russian military does!
Why do you have to pay to see Russian people?
Because the zoo is not free, Duhhhhh🙄
*America shoots down balloon*
China: "You killed an innocent man!!"
USA: "What?!"
China: "Yes, he was a famous sumo wrestler."
Ok guys, I have one last joke (for now).
What do you call it when Panera is over?
Panera end.
What do you call a prostitute weed dealer?
A pot-hole.
You know you have twisted humor when you crack a smile when a Minecraft farmer says he separates the white sheep from the colored ones.
Kid 1: "Hey, I bet you're still a virgin."
Kid 2: "Yeah, I was a virgin until last night."
Kid 1: "As if."
Kid 2: "Yeah, just ask your sister."
Kid 1: "I don't have a sister."
Kid 2: "You will in about nine months."
Cars are like bullets; you jump in front of one, and they solve all your problems.
How are baseball and an orphan different?
A baseball game you can do a home run.