Work jokes
A foreign man came to America not knowing a word of English and right away began looking for a job. He became a chorus teacher and learned to say, "Mi-mi-mi-mi-mi!" After that he joined the Army and learned to say, "Yes sir!" After that he worked at a restaurant and learned to say, "Forks and knives, forks and knives!" After that he worked at a candy store and picked up the words, "Goody-goody gumdrops!"
A few weeks later, there was a murder in the area and he was the first person to be interrogated by the police. The interrogation went as follows:
Policeman: "Who killed the man?" Foreign man: "Mi-mi-mi-mi-mi!" Policeman: "Did you kill the man?" Foreign man: "Yes sir!" Policeman: "What did you use to kill him?" Foreign man: "Forks and knives, forks and knives!" Policeman: "You're under arrest." Foreign man: "Goody-goody gumdrops!"
What did Goodlife Fitness say to LA Fitness? "I guess it's just not 'working out'!"
Why was the German in a hurry?
Because he was Rush-ian to get to work.
What do lady dogs (bitches) wear to work?
Pant suits.
I am sorry, but the input "Fuck" is not sufficient to generate a joke. I need more content to work with to create a humorous narrative or pun.
I have many jokes about unemployed people, sadly none of them work.
Why did the man decide to work at a pizza place?
Because he kneaded the dough!
What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and a baby?
Both of their legs don't work.
Did you hear about the blonde that worked at the Dollar Store?
She called for a price check.
Tell your teacher this: "I passed a test that took 60 minutes. It wasn't your work, it wasn't my work, it was hour work!"
So we were working with a new client at work, and my boss farts. He said, "A little gas never killed anyone."
When Stephen Hawking entered Heaven and met with the Lord, after a short interview God asked: "Hey Stephen, I need you to explain to me how does all this stuff work?"
A kid has an older brother that’s a very popular lifeguard. He sees all of the people that talk to his brother, but he’s fairly ignored. So one day he asks his brother why everyone likes him so much. His older brother says, “Well, all you gotta do is stick a potato in your pocket.” So the next day the boy goes back to the pool and he has a potato in his pocket, but everyone is avoiding him even more now. At the end of the day he goes up to his brother and asks why it didn’t work, and his brother says, “Dumbass, you were supposed to put it in the front!”
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
"SUPPLIES!"
What do you do if your dishwasher stops working?
Punch her in the face and remind her of her duties.
Nurse: Don't worry, I'm great with babies. Parents: You are? Nurse: Yeah, I always abort them. Parent:... Parent: You're hired.
So there was a school shooting in Florida. Why didn't the shooter just go to Disney?.......sorry, I just work there and I'm trying to get people to come on down.
Q: Why did the teacher die?
A: Because he hated his life.
Why do pills work?
Because they are white.
I used to work at a calendar factory, but I got fired because I missed a few days.