What do you call an Autistic kid?
A work of Daniel.
Work Jokes
I tried to think of how lighting works.
Then it struck me!
I used to have a friend who worked at a car shop who liked hunting.
I’m not friends with him anymore because he turned my dog into a car-pet.
How many babies does it take to shingle a roof? Depends on how thin you slice them. -Hope Marie Lawson
I did a ton of work today, a skele-ton.
The experienced carpenter really nailed it, but the new guy screwed everything up.
When I was little, I would pray to Jesus every night for him to get me a new bike. I learned one week in Sunday school that that's not how it works, so instead I just stole one and asked him for forgiveness.
A man with no arms is tasked with a lot of jobs. Then he says to his boss, "I can't handle all of this!"
I've done a ton of work today.
A SKELE-ton of work!
What did the guy exclaim after inventing the shovel?
It is ground breaking!
Why was the man fired from a calendar factory? He took a day off.
Why did the girl quit her job at the donut factory?
She was fed up with the hole business.
If a midget with down syndrome shows up late for work, is it okay to say she's a little tardy?
Who can shave 20 times a day and still have a beard? -- A barber.
Why did the gym close down? -- It just didn't work out.
Why do cows wear bells?
Because their horns don't work.
I lost my job at the bank on my very first day. -- A woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.
I went for a job interview today and the manager said, "We're looking for someone who is responsible."
"Well, I'm your man," I replied, "In my last job, whenever anything went wrong, they said I was responsible."
After God created 24 hours of alternating darkness and light, one of the angels asked him, "What are you going to do now?"
God said, "I think I'm going to call it a day."
Yo mama's so fat, she works in the movie theater as a screen.
