Wordplay jokes
What sea creature can add up? A octoplus.
What's a prisoner's favorite game?
Hangman!
The "W" in Africa stands for water.
What are Michael Jackson's favorite sodas? Yoo-hoo-hoo and Mountain Dew-hoo-hoo. What cola company should people get to keep him at bay? Pep-see-hee.
I called an Asian person and asked, 'Is this Mister Wing?' 'No.'
I called once more and asked, 'Is this Mister Wong?' 'No.'
I guess I 'winged the Wong number.'
Memes
(True story) Today I was bringing some tortilla chips upstairs for some chips and dip, and I dropped them, so my mom goes “Oh, now they’re broken.”
And I took an opportunity to make a pun, so I said, “No, they’re just chipped.”
Zelensky: I'm begging for Russian forces to withdraw from the whole of Ukraine.
Putin: Crimea river.
If a bike is also called a bicycle, then what is a test also called?
A tEsTiClE!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Suicide.
Suicide who?
Suicide you.
What do you call a dear with no eyes?
I have no eye deer!
What do you call a male prostitute in a bar...
Handy Andy.
What do you call a deer who is funny?
Diraleous.
What's a footlong and slippery?
A slipper.
Do you know what the F in Orphan stands for?
Family.
Dude,
if you stab a cereal box, will that make you a cereal killer?
My first name is Al and my last name is Coholic :) #yuengling.f/wat
What's Moby Dick's dad's name? Papa Boner.
What do you call an Italian with a rubber toe?
Roberto.
What is Hitler's favorite letter?
Not-Z.
What do you call a different spaghetti? An impasta!
PAPYRUS: WHAT DO YOU CALL A DIFFERENT SPAGHETTI SANS?
SANS: What?
PAPYRUS: AN IMPASTA!
SANS: Good one.