Wordplay jokes
How are peppers 🌶 so nosey?
They get jalapeño business.
What do you call a clever clock?
Clockwise.
Mother: How is my little cookie doing?
Doctor: Your cookie is feeling crummy right now.
Mother: Really?
Doctor: But don’t worry. Things are about to get batter.
Mother: 😁♥️🍪
What is the chemical formula for a banana? BaNa2
What do you call a sleeping dinosaur? A dinosnore!
What do you call lesbian twins?
Lick-A-Likes.
I lost my dog. I probably shouldn't have named him "rape."
So you know those people that commit suicide by hanging themselves? I guess they lost Hangman.
Why can't orphans go big? When you go big, it's considered family size.
What sea creature can add up? A octoplus.
The "W" in Africa stands for water.
I tell dad jokes all the time even though I’m not actually a dad.
I’m a faux pa.
What are Michael Jackson's favorite sodas? Yoo-hoo-hoo and Mountain Dew-hoo-hoo. What cola company should people get to keep him at bay? Pep-see-hee.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Suicide.
Suicide who?
Suicide you.
If a bike is also called a bicycle, then what is a test also called?
A tEsTiClE!
(True story) Today I was bringing some tortilla chips upstairs for some chips and dip, and I dropped them, so my mom goes “Oh, now they’re broken.”
And I took an opportunity to make a pun, so I said, “No, they’re just chipped.”
Zelensky: I'm begging for Russian forces to withdraw from the whole of Ukraine.
Putin: Crimea river.
What's a footlong and slippery?
A slipper.
Do you know what the F in Orphan stands for?
Family.
My first name is Al and my last name is Coholic :) #yuengling.f/wat