Wordplay jokes
Mother: How is my little cookie doing?
Doctor: Your cookie is feeling crummy right now.
Mother: Really?
Doctor: But don’t worry. Things are about to get batter.
Mother: 😁♥️🍪
Teacher: Hey Timmy (the quiet kid), what comes after X?
The quiet kid: Splosion.
Teacher: What comes after A?
The quiet kid: AK-47.
Teacher: Faints.
What is the difference between Trump and a flying pig? The letter F.
What do you call a sleeping dinosaur? A dinosnore!
I lost my dog. I probably shouldn't have named him "rape."
Memes
So you know those people that commit suicide by hanging themselves? I guess they lost Hangman.
Why can't orphans go big? When you go big, it's considered family size.
What does the Gay Garlic do when it gets hot? It takes it's CLOVES off. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Like if you LOL every time 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
What do you call an Indian with pink hair?
Ghandi floss.
What do you call a person with no body and no nose? "Nobody knows."
What sea creature can add up? A octoplus.
What's a prisoner's favorite game?
Hangman!
The "W" in Africa stands for water.
What do you call a male prostitute in a bar...
Handy Andy.
(True story) Today I was bringing some tortilla chips upstairs for some chips and dip, and I dropped them, so my mom goes “Oh, now they’re broken.”
And I took an opportunity to make a pun, so I said, “No, they’re just chipped.”
Zelensky: I'm begging for Russian forces to withdraw from the whole of Ukraine.
Putin: Crimea river.
What do you call a deer who is funny?
Diraleous.
KFC doesn't mean Kentucky Fried Chicken, it means "Kill Fat Children."
My first name is Al and my last name is Coholic :) #yuengling.f/wat
What's Moby Dick's dad's name? Papa Boner.