Two boys are wandering in the woods, playing games. Suddenly they come across a naked lady, and one of the boys starts running, the other chases after him and asks: "Why did you start running?". The boy replies with: "My mom said if I ever see a naked lady, then I would turn to stone. And I can already feel a part of me turning hard."
I'll kill a bitch like the policeman did to that white women he chopped her up and put her in the woods the suck fuck.
school shootings are everywhere. in ice cream shops and even the woods
She's so fat that when she steps on to a wood floor that the floorboard doesn't creak, it screams: "Goddamn!!!" before it snaps from the weight.
having sex in the woods and a deer walks up and fucks you from the back.
If you spin a fidget spinner You'll end up spinning it too fast when you end up spinning it too fast It will make you fly away when you fly away you'll end up in a tree when you end up in a tree You'll see that your friends are hanging out without you When you see that your friends are hanging out without you You'll run away in the woods because your sad When you ran away in the woods you'll see a bear when you see a bear it will chase you when the bear chases you you'll build a fort to protect yourself when you build a fort to protect yourself You than notice your lonely You'll become friends with the bear When you become friends with a bear, you'll start to act like a bear when you start to act like a bear You will become a bear DO NOT BECOME A BEAR NEVER PLAY WITH A FIDGET SPINNER
What's the difference between a hippie chick and a can of spam After 6 months in the woods you'll still eat the can of spam
I killed a Wood elf yesterday. The gaurd charged me with...mer-der
Jesus was a carpenter who got nailed to a piece of wood
wo tall trees, a birch and a beech, are growing in the woods. A small tree begins to grow between them, and the beech says to the birch, “Is that a son of a beech or a son of a birch?” The birch says he cannot tell, but just then a woodpecker lands on the sapling. The birch says, “Woodpecker, you are a tree expert. Can you tell if that is a son of a beech or a son of a birch?” The woodpecker takes a taste of the small tree and replies, “It is neither a son of a beech nor a son of a birch, It is, however, the best piece of ash I have ever poked my pecker into.”
Therapy -Expensive -Years of hard work -Emotionaly draining -Tough to find
Screaming in the woods -Free -Immediate relief -Scares hunters enough to leave therefore saving innocent animals -Potential to make friends with people who are also screaming in the woods
If your hot dog taste like a peace of wood who gonna call GHOST MUSTERD
Why did sellwood git named? It is made of wood that got sold.
so a guy and his brother was walking in the woods so his brother said "its getting dark out here can we go home" the man said "i know think how i will feel walking home tonight"
Jefferey Dahmer asked his husband a question
His husband said, whats your question?
Jefferey Dahmer said, "You want to know what is my favorite type of tree?"
His husband said "Yes?"
Jefferey said, "Morning Wood, now take off your pants"
A man takes a boy into the woods boy says Boy: Mister I’m scared and it’s dark and cold The Man: How do you think I feel I’m walking out here alone
What’s your favorite type of wood? Mine is Bollywood
three indans get captured by an enemy leader and the leaders says "go in the woods and find 10 fruits of the same kind.The first one comes back with apples.The enemy leader says "shove them up your butt and don't make a sound or i will kill you.He get to two and yell.The leader killed him.He goes up to heaven.The second guy come back and has grapes he gets to 9 and laughes.The leader kills him.He goes to heavenThe first guy askes the second guy why did you laugh you had it in the bag.The second guy said he say the third guy carring pineapples.
2 hunter are walking in the forest together. Hunter #2 flops down, unconscious, and and hunter #1 dials 911. Operator: "911 what's your emergency?" Hunter no. 1: "The other hunter, hunting with me in the woods fell asleep." Operator: "Check if he's / she's (not assuming genders) dead." *Operator hears a distant gunshot* Hunter no. 1: "What do I do next?"
The very young and pretty nun was walking home from the soup kitchen when a homeless man dragged her into the woods and had his way with her. When he was done, he asked her what she would tell the Mother Superior when she got back to the convent. She calmly said that she would tell her the truth. She said: "I will tell her that I was on my way home when the most disgusting, repulsive and abhorrent man dragged me into the woods and had his way with me..... twice; that is if you are not too tired.
