Guy starts chatting to pretty woman at a party Seeing that she didn't back off he asked her name. "Carmen," she replied. That's a nice name," he said warming up the conversation,
"Who named you, your mother?"
"No, I named myself, she answered.
"Oh, that's interesting. Why Carmen?"
"Because I like cars, and I like men," she said looking directly into his eyes. "So what's your name?" she asked.
‘BJ Titsngolf’
Q: What is the difference between a battery and a woman? A: A battery has a positive side
Hitler visits a lunatic asylum. The patients give the Hitler salute. As he passes down the line he comes across a woman who Isn't saluting. Why are you not saluting like the others? Hitler barks. "Mein Führer, Im the nurse," she responds "Im not crazy!
What do you call a woman with one arm and one leg? Eileen
A blind woman told me I had a big penis yesterday.
I think she was pulling my leg.
What kind of woman does Bill Cosby like the most?
The “cold and passed out” kind.
A doctor tells a woman she can no longer touch anything alcoholic. So she gets a divorce.
*Your friend walks up to you and shows you a picture of an overweight woman*
What would you rate this woman?
A 7
Why?
Because 7 ate 9!
At the funeral of a family friend, I was chatting to June, an elderly lady I hadn’t seen since I was a teenager. I was thrilled when she told me what a beautiful young woman I’d become.
On the journey home, I remarked to my mother how lovely it had been to see June again.
“Yes, it’s such a shame that she’s gone blind,” she said sadly.
What do you call it if your mom is a guy and ur dad is a woman?
Transparent
(I want to apologize in advance. These are very dark jokes) 1. What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick
2. I was going to tell a dead baby joke. But I decided to abort.
3. Why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle? His wife is dead.
4.Why does Helen Keller hate porcupines? They're painful to look at.
5. Why can't orphans play baseball? They don't know where home is.
6. Give a man a match, and he'll be warm for a few hours. Set a man on fire, and he will be warm for the rest of his life.
7. I asked a pretty, young homeless woman if I could take her home. She smiled at me and said yes. The look on her face soon changed, however, when I walked off with her cardboard box.
8. My wife and I have reached the difficult decision that we do not want children. If anybody does, please just send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.
I believe in a woman's right to choose... ... whether she wants to cook first and then clean or clean first and then cook.
I don’t see what the problem is.
The Supreme Court came up with a solution to the tampon shortage, yet all the liberals are pissed!
What did the man say to the woman. "Make me a sandwhich".
Michael proveed anything is possible in America. Where else can a poor black bo grow up to be a rich white woman?
If I grew a nanometer taller for every 2/10 woman expecting a 6’3”+ guy, I would be considered attractive💀
We split because she used always say I never listen, or something like that
q: what are women better than men at doing
a: winning arguments
q: what are men better than women at doing
a: winning swimming titles
Time waits for no man, time is obviously a woman.
