A guy starts chatting to a pretty woman at a party.
Seeing that she didn't back off, he asked her name. "Carmen," she replied. "That's a nice name," he said, warming up the conversation. "Who named you, your mother?"
"No, I named myself," she answered.
"Oh, that's interesting. Why Carmen?"
"Because I like cars, and I like men," she said, looking directly into his eyes. "So what's your name?" she asked.
‘BJ Titsngolf’
Q: What is the difference between a battery and a woman?
A: A battery has a positive side.
Hitler visits a lunatic asylum. The patients give the Hitler salute. As he passes down the line, he comes across a woman who isn't saluting.
"Why are you not saluting like the others?" Hitler barks.
"Mein Führer, I'm the nurse," she responds. "I'm not crazy!"
What’s another name for cumming inside a woman?
Loading the dishwasher.
What do you call a woman with one arm and one leg?
Eileen.
A blind woman told me I had a big penis yesterday.
I think she was pulling my leg.
What kind of woman does Bill Cosby like the most?
The “cold and passed out” kind.
A doctor tells a woman she can no longer touch anything alcoholic. So, she gets a divorce.
Your friend walks up to you and shows you a picture of an overweight woman.
What would you rate this woman?
A 7.
Why?
Because 7 ate 9!
At the funeral of a family friend, I was chatting to June, an elderly lady I hadn’t seen since I was a teenager. I was thrilled when she told me what a beautiful young woman I’d become.
On the journey home, I remarked to my mother how lovely it had been to see June again.
“Yes, it’s such a shame that she’s gone blind,” she said sadly.
What do you call it if your mom is a guy and your dad is a woman?
Transparent.
What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.
I believe in a woman's right to choose...
...whether she wants to cook first and then clean or clean first and then cook.
I don’t see what the problem is.
The Supreme Court came up with a solution to the tampon shortage, yet all the liberals are pissed!
What did the man say to the woman? "Make me a sandwich."
Michael proved anything is possible in America. Where else can a poor black boy grow up to be a rich white woman?
If I grew a nanometer taller for every 2/10 woman expecting a 6’3”+ guy, I would be considered attractive.💀
We split because she would always say I never listen, or something like that.
Q: What are women better than men at doing?
A: Winning arguments.
Q: What are men better than women at doing?
A: Winning swimming titles.
Time waits for no man, time is obviously a woman.
