Wish Jokes

Why do orphans like familys? because they wish they had one.

Police officers hope you’re a criminal. Doctors hope you get sick. Mechanics hope you get car troubles. But only thieves wish you prosperity. Weird?

One spelling mistake can completely ruin your marriage

I accidentally texted my wife “I’m having a wonderful time. I wish you were her.”

i wish my grass was emo so it would cut its self

an emo kid sees his clothes hanging to dry and he says to his clothes"i wish i were you"

Orphan finds genie

Orphan:my first wish is to be Rich

Genie: of course

Orphan:my second wish is to be famous

Genie:done

Orphan: I wish my parents can come back Genie: I told you I can't bring people back from the dead

So I bus crashes killing everyone on the bus and god feels so bad that he gives each one a wish so the first person comes up and she wants to be beautiful so god makes her beautiful and she goes into heaven next person comes up and he says I want to be beautiful as well as the last man in the back begins laughing a little so this goes on everyone becoming beautiful until god asked the last person what they want and he said I want everyone in front of me to be ugly again! so god had to call the based department and gave him everything that last guy wanted

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

If I had a genie grant me wishes, I wouldn't wish for a million pounds. I'd just wish that every time I buy something I just have the right amount of money in my pocket at the time

hi plz like for good luck!

I wish Stephen Hawking was an organ donor. I need some parts for my laptop

“Give me 5 cents and I’ll grant you a wish” Ok “Thank you what is your wish” I wish for my 5 cents back

When my Uncle Frank died, he wanted his cremations to be buried in his favorite beer mug. His last wish was to be Frank in Stein.

This joke includes potentially sensitive content.

Why do orphans wish they had a bounty on them so that they can be wanted

I asked a orphan his parents was

( God I wish know)

Brrr it's fucking cold outside aye? What do you guys want for Christmas? A sweet video game? Maybe a cool action figure? Oh how about the latest phone! Who me? Oh I guess... I wish snow could melt as fast as the snowflakes that downvote good jokes! Merry Christmas ya filthy animals!