Wish jokes

There are times I miss you, that I wish I could remember where I hid your body.

Funny.

Why aren’t Make-A-Wish kids allowed to fly?

Because they rarely make it out of the terminal.

I wish death was in the form of a woman.

That way, it would never come for me.

What does an orphan wish they could do?

Wish happy Mother's Day and Father's Day.

Farrah Fawcett, upon arriving at the pearly gates, God asked her, for having led such an honest life, to grant her one wish. Farrah simply requested that the children of the world would be safe.

Five hours later, Michael Jackson died.

There are painkillers, but they only relieve physical pain. I wish something could relieve my internal pain.

I just wish I went on a date with Ariana Grande, and then everybody knew I fucked Ariana Grande.

I wish that when Mario dies to some random object, I died too.

A kid had school today.

He was late every single day. He said in his mind, "I wish I can go to school again." What happened? It's obvious...... He died :)

Genie: What are your 3 wishes?

Me: Make every word 4 letters long.

Geni: Wish Gran.

Me: Make every word start with "br".

Genie: Brsh Bran.

Me: Bree: brke brer brrd brnd brth "uh".

Bruh: Bruh bruh.

Bruh: Bruh bruh bruh.

Bruh: Bruh bruh.

A boy sat in his bed, watching a meteor shower. He was a vengeful child and wished that his parents would no longer bother him whilst he was gaming.

The next morning, he woke up to find his mother had passed away in the night. Clearly his wish had worked. However, his father worked a midnight job, and as such the boy was very confused when he returned home from work, expecting him to have met the same fate.

The two of them then looked out the window in thought, only to find the milkman lying dead on the pavement.

Marriage is like a deck of cards.

In the beginning, all you need is two hearts and a diamond.

By the end, you wish you had a club and a spade.

I wish the doctor would prescribe me some medicine that's actually useful, like cyanide.

Men and women are not equal, speaking biologically and mentally. I don't care what other feminists say. Men are naturally physically stronger, while women are more mentally stable (sometimes). The internet and the media will lie. You feminists say that you are stronger. Well, you wish. You can't hit a girl because she is more sensitive, but she says she is stronger. Like, what the hell?

We're not sexist men; you're sexist women. And BTW, you'll rot in hell for hating God's creation. And also, men were created before women. Search it up in the Bible or online.

What does the depressed person say to the happy person?

"Damn, I wish I was on the stuff you're on, lol."

Orphan: I wish to be like Batman.

Genie: Your wish is granted.

Orphan goes home. His parents are dead.

What do a Make-A-Wish kid and mosquitoes have in common?

They both got a 10% survival rate...

Mama is so Catholic, Swiss cheese wishes it was as holy as she is. Do you...

What is George Floyd's favorite song?

"Wishing Well" by Juice WRLD.