I wish i did't have depression because all my friends have BBC Bitch be crazy disease.
I was a sit down comedian then i try to stand up I felled
I wished i stayed in the wheelchair.
There are pain killers but they only relieve physical pain. I wish something could relieve my internal pain.
You aren’t alone. If you ever need to chat I’m here. From one person to another. I hate this condition. I wish we didn’t struggle
rose are red i wish you were dead
i wish i was a dinosaur because all of them are dead
I wish my name was Voyager 2... So I could have the first encounter with Uranus. :)
Sometimes I wish u could use my school scissors on my heart
A guy walks into a bar. He goes up to the bartender and says: If i can suprise you, i get a free drink. The bartender was unsure but agreed. The guy pulled up a 30cm long pianist out of his pocket and he starts to play The bartender was suprised and gave the guy a free drink The guy then sais: You see, i have a little wizard in my pocket that grants wishes, can i get another free drink if you get a free wish? The bartender agrees without hesitation The bartender wishes for a 1000 bucks, but he gets a 1000 ducks WTF! the man shouts. The guy answered: Did you think i wanted a 30cm long pianist
I wish I was a toe bc I want to be banged all day
My wife says s*x is even better on holiday. I wish she didn’t tell me via email.
I wish my nails were emo so that they would cut themselves
So two guys walk into a bar one says can I have something to drink, the other says, you wish LOLOLOLOLOLOLO ldab on the haters-Jake Paul wreeeeecckkked.................... DABDABDABDBABABDBABDBABDBABDBDABDBsabBaDBAD,,,,,,,,,,five fo e the winners. KILL MATPAT, THE EARTH IS FLAT AND A DONUT
One man was very depressed cause he lost everything. He lost his job. He lost his home and he lost his wife. So he went lonely into the forest to grief. Suddenly with the head rise up he sees Santa Claus walking by. - Santa? he asks. 'Why are you early, it is not even christmas?' - ho, ho. Don't worry about me. Lets worry about you instead' says Santa. What is the problem my friend?' - I lost everything good in my life. I got fired from my job. My wife divorced me. I lost my house.' Santa: I can help you. You can wish three things you want in life and i'll give it to you-' Man: My first wish is i want my house back. Santa: Done! Man: My second wish is i want 1 million amount of cash in my bank account. Santa: Done! Man: My third wish is i also want my job back! Santa: Done, but before i actually give you those wishes, I haft to hump you. Man: Okey. Lets do it. So the Santa claus takes of his pants to hump the man. After they are done humping the santa ask the man: -How old are you? Man: I am 35 years old. Santa: And still believe in Santa Claus??!! HOHOHOHO!!!
wanna know something the orphan could never do
wish anyone a happy Mother’s Day or Father’s Day
Mother: "Sweetie, make a Christmas wish." Girl: "I wish that Santa will send some clothes to those naked girls in papa's computer."
"I wish I was either Christmas lights or a mistletoe " " why?" "Because I want to hang"
I wish 911 was in December because the poor farm feilds
I love it when your parents come round for Christmas, I just wish we couldn't hear them through the ceiling.
I wish they taught 9/11 at school
It would make these jokes more explosive 🧨