Why jokes
After a lord comes back from vacation, he meets the gardener at the gates of his park.
Lord: "Has something happened while I was gone?"
Gardener: "Ah, nothing much, I just broke a shovel while I was burying your dog."
Lord: "My dog died?!"
Gardener: "Yes, it choked on the smoke when your mansion burnt down."
Lord: "My mansion?! How?!"
Gardener: "Well, your wife was distraught and dropped a candle on the curtains."
Lord: "Why was she so distraught?"
Gardener: "She received the news of your daughter being kidnapped."
Lord: "My daughter! Don't you have any positive news for me?!"
Gardener: "Oh right! Your cancer test results!"
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the gay man's house.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
Why did Steven Hawking not go to heaven after he died?
He could not get up the stairs?
Why does the nucleus feel trapped?
Because it’s inside a cell!
Why were the people in the Twin Towers sad?
They ordered pepperoni pizza, but all they got was plane.
Memes
Why did God make men?
Because you can't teach a vibrator how to mow the lawn...
Why do Indians hate snow?
Because it's white and all over their land.
What do children and lights have in common? They both hang from ceilings!
Not funny, here’s another.
Why can’t China play baseball? They ate the bat.
Why are fish easy to measure?
Because they bring their own scales.
Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? - In case he got a hole in one.
Like this if you laughed.
These orphan jokes would leave them crying to their mommies if they had any.
I made a website for orphans. Unfortunately, it doesn’t have a home page.
Why is it ok to hit an orphan? It’s not like they can tell their parents.
Why did the orphan go to church? So he had someone to call Father.
Why do orphans love boomerangs? Because they come back. (Clearly someone didn't come back with the milk)
Why was the orphan so successful? When they told him go big or go home, he only had one option.
What’s the only advantage of being an orphan? Nobody makes jokes about yo mamma.
Hope you had fun reading this! My friend and I laughed reading all of em!
Why was Stephen Hawking's wife mad at him?
She caught him having an affair with his shoulder.
Why shouldn’t you play basketball with a pig?
Because he’s a ball hog.
Why can't dinosaurs clap? Because they're dead.
Why can't an orphan go to McDonald's? There's no point in the words "happy meal."
Why did Queen Elizabeth the II die?
Because she ran out of immortali-tea.
Why does Spider-Man only have 11 months?
He lost May.
Why did Billy fall off his bike?
Because his dad threw a chair at him.
If you want to pick on someone, pick on orphans. Let them tell their parents.
Double!
Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere!
Triple!
Why did Bob cross the road? Because he wasn't wearing his seatbelt.
Why did the family get mad at the boy for eating at the funeral?
While trying to season his food, he mistook his cremated grandfather for salt.