I'm still wondering who took Jesus' sandals.
Even the one who ate that dove that sat at Jesus' shoulder. 🤔
Whos Jokes
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Owl.
Owl who?
Who? Are you meant to ask "who?"
Mom: Can I tell you a joke?
Kid: Sure.
Mom: Knock knock.
Kid: Who's there?
Mom: Not yo.
Kid: Not yo who?
Mom: Not yo father.
Kid: Not yo husband either.
My father, who flew the plane, couldn't have a funeral, he went everywhere.
I pushed an orphan and they said, "I'm telling!" I asked, "Telling who? Your parents?"
People say my dad left me and was never successful, but if you search up who destroyed the Twin Towers, he will pop up.
Also, my mom's great grandpa killed Hitler.
Did you hear about the guy who dipped his balls in glitter? Pretty nuts!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Spell.
Spell who?
W. H. O.
Me and my girlfriend broke up, and I stole her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?
Hello everyone, now a question to make it in there is no right or wrong answer, but who here has watched fireb0rn??
Hello everybody, now who here have watched Skurry?
Who was not happy that the Titanic sank? The fish under it.
So who did it? the I.S.S. teacher said.
1 hour before:
So let me get...
Random person: Wait, what? You BROKE UP WITH HER!
Me: I SWEAR, JHONNY, THIS IS THE 3RD TIME YOU BUTT INTO MY CONVERSATION! SO... HERE... YOU... GO! *punches*
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Di.
Di who?
See, easily forgotten.
Me: Knock, knock.
Other person: Who’s there?
Me: Atch.
Other person: Atch who?
Me: Bless you!
Me: Knock knock.
My Grandma: Who’s there?
Me: Interrupting cow.
My Grandma: Interrupting c-
[Dies from heart attack]
Why did an old man fall in a well? Because he couldn’t see that well!
Why did the actor fall through the floorboards? They were going through a stage!
Why did a scarecrow win a Nobel prize? He was outstanding in his field!
Why are peppers the best at archery? Because they habanero!
What did the duck say after she bought chapstick? Put it on my bill!
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!
What did the three-legged dog say when he walked into a saloon? “I’m looking for the man who shot my paw!”
How do you tell the difference between a bull and a cow? It is either one or the udder!
What’s red and smells like blue paint? Red paint!
What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo? One is very heavy, the other is a little lighter!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
A dragon.
A dragon who?
The dragon gonna drag its balls across your face.
Little April was not the best student in Sunday school. Usually she slept through the class.
One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, “Tell me, April, who created the universe?” When April didn’t stir, little Johnny, a boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her in the rear. “GOD ALMIGHTY!” shouted April and the teacher said, “Very good,” and April fell back asleep.
A while later the teacher asked April, “Who is our Lord and Savior?” But, April didn’t even stir from her slumber. Once again, Johnny came to the rescue and stuck her again. “JESUS CHRIST!” shouted April and the teacher said, “very good,” and April fell back to sleep.
Then the teacher asked April a third question. “What did Eve say to Adam after she had her twenty-third child?” And again, Johnny jabbed her with the pin. This time April jumped up and shouted, “IF YOU STICK THAT F*****G THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME, I’LL BREAK IT IN HALF AND STICK IT UP YOUR ARSE!” The Teacher fainted.
Did you hear about the cello player who dreamed he was performing Bolero?
He woke up and found out it was true.
