Wheres

Wheres jokes

Orphan

  • I made this up.

    I was watching a school baseball game, and I was yelling at a kid to take it home. He took the bat and threw it, and then ran away. I asked the teacher/coach what the problem was, and he said the kid was an orphan, and I started laughing so hard.

    Later that night, I wondered where he stormed off to after he threw the bat, and I thought to myself, "Not home."

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    People

  • Okay, I love reading Freshfry's conversations with random people. I love the ones where he has a full blown talking battle. I personally like reading them and I love reading them on my Chromebook while I play Call of Duty and Fortnite on my Xbox.

    If you guys out there like reading Freshfry's conversations with random people, just comment and tell me. Talk to you guys later, watersharky out.

    Life

  • May our days be abundant, a dance of delight, May I navigate life with courage, taking flight. May our journey be a beauty, a blessing so sweet, May I celebrate friendships, where hearts and souls meet.

    May our nights be bright, with laughter and cheer, May we live with love, eliminating every fear. May I grow in kindness, a serenade of grace, May our lives be a marvel, a splendid embrace.

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    Guy

  • A drunk guy is showing friends his new apartment.

    The last stop is the bedroom, where a big brass gong sits next to the bed.

    "What's that gong for?" the friend asks him.

    "It's not a gong," the drunk replies. "It's a talking clock."

    "How does it work?"

    The guy picks up a hammer, gives the gong an ear-shattering pound, and steps back.

    Suddenly, someone on the other side of the wall screams, "For God's sake, you asshole, it's 3:30 in the god damn morning!"

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  • Suicide

  • A man walks into a library.

    Man: "Hello ma'am, do you know where I can find a book on suicide?"

    Librarian: "Do you know about our return policy?"

    Suicidal Man: ...

    Librarian: ...

    The Woman checking out a book: "WHAT THE FUCK?"

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    Birth

  • Daughter: Where was I born?

    Dad: Alabama.

    Daughter: That is nice.

    Mum: We have never been to Alabama.

    Dad: RUN!

    Stress

  • Why is Donald Trump under so much stress?

    Because he signed up to be on an album where somebody says "no love for the rich" on it.

    Condom

  • Mom: Son, where are my condoms?

    Son: What are condoms?

    Dad: She puts it on me and the sandwich.

    Son: Wait, why did my girlfriend come over and take one?

    Dad: Um, I don't know, but go to bed.

    Son: But it's 2:46pm in the afternoon, bruh.

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    Hacker

  • If Red gets voted out, what happened?

    Red is not voted out, Red is a hacker, so he kills Blue. OK, so someone found Blue's body. Red said, "Where?"

    Lime, Green, and Purple said, "How is Red not dead?"

    Red: "I am a hacker, you noobs!"

    Lime, Green, and Purple run.

    Red killed them all. Red is the win, but he is not the win.

    Black killed Red. Black is the win.

    LOL

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