When jokes

Abortion clinic

I was dying when I called my sister and she said, "Hi, this is Pepperoni's pizza and abortion clinic; your loss, our sauce. How may I help you today?"

Chicken

What did the chicken say when he saw a human running around uncontrollably?

"It's running around like a chicken with its head cut off!"

Mama

Yo mama is so ugly that when she turned on the TV, it changed channels by itself.

Pet

What do you say to your pet when you're super tired, slow, and worn out?

"I'm totally dogging it today..."

Dog

What did the dog say when he got its tail caught in the door?

"It won't be long now..."

Memes

Shirt

What did the undershirt say to the T-shirt when they were fighting?

"If you don't shut up right now, you're gonna lose your shirt!!!"

Get it?

Orphan

When you're angry, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

Time

What time is it when you get home, can walk walk home and walk walk home from school?

Time

What time is it when you get home and you walk walk home from school and walk walk home from school and walk walk home from school and walk walk home from school and walk walk home from school? Oooooo day, a great night for

Time

What time is it when you can walk home from school today and walk?

Time

What time is it when you get home and you can walk walk home and walk walk?

Father

When you go to your girlfriend's house but accidentally go into her dad's room and fuck him anyway.

Man

Why did the man laugh when he only had just one nickel and one penny in his pocket?

He had a 6 cents of humor.

Beet

What does the beet DJ say when he's partying?

"Dance to the beet, y'all!"

Wje

What do you call Shroud when he is hurt?

ShrOWd.

Guess what, Shroud is back on wje, I don't know why, but he is...

Sheep

What is it called when young sheep bet?

LAMbling.

(haven't uploaded yesterday cuz couldn't think of a joke)

Egg

Q: What did the egg do when the bacon told it a joke?

A: It cracked up!

Washer

When the washer started running, why did you join me?

Because I had to catch it.