When jokes
What happens when the music note starts to misbehave?
Then he gets into treble!
What did the Los Angeles Police do when George Floyd said that he could not breathe? They gave George Floyd two squirts of Zicam cold remedy inside his nose.
When a man sleeps with a lot of women, he's called a stud. When a woman sleeps with a lot of men, she's called your mum.
What do you call it when you're trying to find out what someone had for lunch?
An ingestigation.
"When I heard that not arguing or fighting in a relationship represents a lack of interest, that's when my girlfriend started missing her makeup box."
God, when terminally ill children beg him to heal them:
God: No, I don’t want to.
What does the EPA issue when a person stinks up a room with their smelly farts?
Air quality alert code brown!
When fat people sit down at a restaurant, you can hear the chair screaming.
My father told me to always carry a women's bag, but I don't know why he called the cops on me when I helped Mom's bag when we went parachuting. :(
What do asses and secrets have in common?
Both are better when not leaked!
Why do they call it oven, when you of in the cold food of out hot eat the food?
What did Jeffrey Dahmer do when done with his black dates?
He dumped them.
When your girlfriend picks you up and decides to prank you by not wearing pants to a seafood restaurant:
Did you get seafood without me? It smells like fish.
What does Michael Joseph Jackson say to adults when he sees them?
Keep away from me-hee-hee.
Q. What happens when a pedophile spills his coffee? A. It leaves an EP-stain.
Palestinians leave without saying goodbye.
Israel says goodbye when the Americans say so.
When Chris Brown heard he wasn’t the only one to hit a woman.
Stop the cap.
Have you ever wondered why you never see a gay guy in a wheelchair?
It’s hard to become a vegetable when you’re already a fruit.
Yo mama so fat that when she gets in the truck, it breaks.
Why is it so punny when Sans tells a joke in the evening?
Because a SANSET is happening.