When jokes

What do you say when your brother has too many jeans?

"Gene-ious!"

When my friend eats a mint, I say, "Hey, is it mint to be sweet?"

Why do women fart when they pee? To blow dry.

I heard my neighbors having sex, and it was annoying me, so I called my girlfriend to ask if she wanted to go out, but when I called her, I heard my neighbors' phone ringing.

What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? Glock, glock.

What did the tree say when spring finally arrived?

"What a re-leaf."

Yo mama's so stupid, when they said it was chilly outside, she grabbed a bowl.

When does a computer function best? When it listens to its motherboard.

When you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall.

What stresses a baby strawberry out?

When its mom is in a jam.

"When I heard that not arguing or fighting in a relationship represents a lack of interest, that's when my girlfriend started missing her makeup box."

When God created mankind, he said, "Damn it! One is off color, the other yellowish. The last one is burnt!"

What did the lettuce say when she is popping the champagne?

When Chris Brown heard he wasn’t the only one to hit a woman.

Stop the cap.

What does your mom say when she is working?

Nothing, it's rude to talk with your mouth full.

Palestinians leave without saying goodbye.

Israel says goodbye when the Americans say so.

Leo is like a cloud... when she disappears, it's a beautiful day.

What did the rapper say when he broke his mic?

"Looks like I dropped the mic... literally!"

What'd the farmer say when a coyote killed and ate his rooster?

"No, you ate my cock!"

What did the rapper say when he lost his voice?

"I guess I'll have to drop a SILENT TRACK!"