When jokes

Eye

    • What did one shoe say to the other shoe when they were fighting?

    "I wanna sock in the eye so bad!"

    Music

    • When my mom said you have to listen to classical music at my new school, I had to listen to it twenty-four seven. After that, I sang the song [with] the wrong melody for my music teacher 😎

    Woman

    • Have you ever noticed when a woman is pregnant all her friends touch her stomach and say “congrats,” but none of them touch the man’s penis and say “well done?”

    Repost

    Girl

    • When you think of the word "simp," you think of a girl. "Girl" stands for ghosts in real life. Another word for simp is "ding dong." Put them together, and you get ghosts in real life with ding dongs.

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    • When memes

    Meat

    • Meat stands for: M - monitoring, E - evaluating, A - assessing/addressing, T - treatment.

    So when you're shoving meat up people's asses, then you're monitoring them, evaluating them, assessing them, and treating them.

    Knife

    • When Knife tells Annoying Orange, "I'm trying something new," Annoying Orange said, "Oh no, are you having a midknife crisis?" and then Annoying Orange laughs.

    Grandfather

    • My grandfather has been through a lot in his time. When he was in the war, he survived a mustard gas attack. And later down the line, he survived being pepper sprayed by the police. He was certainly a real seasoned veteran.

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    • Popsicle

    • What do you say to your customer at a popsicle stand when he asks for the price?

    Dollar a pop!

    Get it?