When jokes
When you meet your gf at the family reunion.
Why did the rapper carry an umbrella?
For when it started RAINING RHYMES.
What shoes do pedophiles wear? White vans.
How do pedophiles fit in? They force it to go in.
How do you make a 16 mm hole into a 40 mm hole? A pedophile comes in.
What did Santa say when he was passing over some hookers? "Ho ho ho!"
When I saw your hairline, I thought I saw kid Jason Voorhees.
Why do midgets laugh when they run?
The grass tickles their balls.
Covid-19 or Rona
When Leicester City won the league in 2015/16, do you think there was a little lad in Africa running around with "Drinkwater" on his back, annoying the hell out of the locals?
What do you do when an orphan gets you mad?
A stab to the neck and a bullet to the face.
When a family friend passed away, my granddaughter took her three-year-old son to visit the widow. As they approached the front door, she whispered to the boy, “Make sure to tell her how sorry you are.” He whispered back, “Why? I didn’t kill him.”
You're so fat, when you went on the weighing scale, it said "to be continued."
When I was a kid, my father would tell me that the black Santa Claus was coming to our house for Christmas. So, instead of putting out cookies and milk, we would put out cornbread and purple Kool-Aid.
When I'm bored, I go into an elevator with a full duffle bag. Once people come in and the door closes, I zip open the bag a little bit and whisper to it, "I'll get you some food once we get off."
What did Mother Mary say when God farted? Jesus Christ, you stink!
You're so brilliant and bright that the Sun wears sunglasses when you're near!
When does a skeleton laugh?
When someone tickles his funny bone!
Your mama is so fat that when she fell, I didn't laugh, but the concrete cracked up.
I tried a pun about water, but people "sea" right through it, and when people complain, they are usually just being a beach.
You should wear binoculars when calculating. It helps divide.
When you let the school shooter borrow your pen so he doesn't kill you.
Yo mamma so poor that when we went on a date, she took off her shoe laces and said "spaghetti."
Yo momma so fat, when she gets in an elevator, it HAS to go down!