When jokes
I’m happy to be with my EA when I go to school.
When I see the little brother in a video get everything, I try it and get grounded ;-;
Q. What's long, hard, and scary when you first see it?
A. Calculus homework.
What happened when the emo tried to high five a tree?
It left him hanging.
Someone: When you suffer from depression and someone tells you to cheer up.
Me: My, what a great idea! Why didn't I think of that? ;)
Me all the time :
Yo mama's so fat that when Legolas killed her, Gimli counted her for two.
When Trump goes to the beach, he doesn't use suntan lotion. He uses Dorito dust, and it stays on for the rest of his life.
What is a good night sleep? I love it when you walk home and walk home from school and walk home and walk home from home and walk home and get a good night walk and walk home from school and walk home from school and walk home from school and walk home from school and walk home from...
Q) What do you call Iron Man when he can't swim?
A) Robert Drowney Jr.
What's the difference between an onion and a hooker?
I cry when I chop up onions.
What is it called when an orphan takes a family photo?
A selfie.
Yesterday in my dream I ate a ten pound marshmallow, when I woke up, my pillow was gone.
Women be like, "Porn is how we get money," then get angry when boys treat women like shit because they seen it on porn.
Bullying orphans is like bullying the homeless kid; both cry when you make fun of their parents.
When I called the suicide hotline in Afghanistan, they got all excited and asked if I could drive a truck.
How does a pimp answer when asked why he chose his occupation?
Answer: He wanted a stable source of income.
Say _______ is so flat that when someone hit them, they got a paper cut!
Slavery has existed in the western world for 3 centuries, but in the Arab regions it has existed before and is still going on, so why don’t people talk about it?
Because it’s only bad when white people do it.
Yesterday I asked an emo girl if she's jealous when her phone dies.
Yo mama is so fat, when she walked past the TV, I missed three episodes.