Whats jokes

Two Canadians die and end up in Hell. Satan decides to pay them a visit, so he walks into their room and sees them talking and laughing. Confused, he asks them why they're happy.

They tell him, "Well, we're so sick of the cold where we're from, and this place is nice and toasty."

Satan, annoyed, storms away and goes to Hell's boiler room, where he turns up the temperature.

He goes back to the Canadians' room, along the way being begged by all sorts of people to put the heating back down. He enters the room to see the Canadians having a barbecue. Furiously, he asks them what they're doing.

"Well, we can't pass up this wonderful weather without getting out the barbecue!"

Satan realizes he's been doing the wrong thing. He goes to the boiler room and turns it down until it's at a colder temperature than ever seen on earth.

He knows he's won now, so he goes back to the Canadians' room, only to see them jumping up and down in excitement.

He shouts at them in fury, "WHY ARE YOU STILL HAPPY?!?!?!"

They look at him and shout at the same time, "Hell froze over! That means the Leafs won!"

What dinosaur loves music?

The velociRAPtor!

What is Uludağ made from? Dog pee!

Doctor: "I am so sorry, I cannot see you today."

Orphan: "Oh, okay. What about tomorrow?"

Doctor: "No, I can't see you ever."

Orphan: "Why?"

Doctor: "Because I am a family doctor."

What's the best cure for aging? Suicide.

What did the doctor say to the Chinese man?

"Some ting wong."

What do you call getting assaulted by a gay man? Fruit punch.

What's at least 6 inches long and goes in your mouth, and it's more fun if it vibrates?

A toothbrush.

What do Kurt Cobain and an emo kid have in common?

They both smell like "Teen Spirit."

What happens if a redneck is bisexual? Do they go for their brother or sister?

What is the worst thing your sibling can steal from you?

Your virginity.

What's the fastest way to stop an argument between a bunch of deaf people?

Just switch off the lights.

Teacher: Tell me what's the solution of this equation? 30g + 24y + 15a - x^3 = 0

Student: 69 gay = xxx

Teacher: You're out!!!

Student lies down on the floor, and then teacher starts f...ing him ^_*

😂😂😂😂

What do you call a gay emo kid?

Fruit Ninja.

What's Africa's greatest sporting achievement? The 2018 World Cup...

How do you know if your sister's on her period?

Your dad's dick tastes funny.

What's worse than fingering your sister?

Finding your dad's wedding ring inside her.

Question: What is the difference between a morbid joke and a dark joke?

Answer: One is 10 babies in a trash can; the other is a baby in 10 trash cans.

Everyone punch orphans. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

A man receives a phone call from his doctor.

The doctor says, "I have some good news and some bad news."

The man says, "OK, give me the good news first."

The doctor says, "The good news is, you have 24 hours to live."

The man replies, "Oh no! If that's the good news, then what's the bad news?"

The doctor says, "The bad news is, I forgot to call you yesterday."

Two friends who've been bros for forever see each other in Wal-Mart in the card section. The first guy asks what he got his wife for her birthday. The second guy tells him he got her a Maserati and a card. The first guy tells him he got his wife a card and a dildo for her birthday.

The second guy asks why he got his wife a dildo for her birthday. The first guy says, "If she doesn't like the card I got her, then she can go fuck herself!"