Whats jokes
What is the difference between an orphan's dad and a boomerang?
Oh... one comes back.
What did the skeleton say when the other skeleton lied to him?
"You can't lie to me! I can see right through you!"
What did the Emo say to the surgeon? "Cut me, please!"
What did the skeleton say to Shrek?
"Jump on me. I can have two layers of skin too."
What is the smallest room in the world?
A mushroom.
Memes
What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
Wiped his ass.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
...You can't call it anything. It won't come to you.
What brakes but never falls, and what falls but never brakes?
Answer: Night falls and dawn brakes.
What if Stephen Hawking was the Real Slim Shady, but no one knew because he couldn't stand up?
What's the fastest way to Shepherd's Bush?
Up Shepherd's leg.
What do inner city schools and databases have in common?
Their problems are usually caused by a race condition.
What did the mechanic say to the other mechanic when he broke the car?
"How will we wrench ourselves out of this?"
What's the difference between a chicken and me? None, they both don't watch right and left before crossing the road.
What does Christian say when he wants out of jail?
"Bale me out!"
What is Stephen Hawking's favorite food?
His left shoulder.
What did the ocean say to the other ocean?
Nothing. They just waved.
Did you sea what I did there?
Did you know what my grandpa wanted for Christmas? A new ass because his one has a crack on it.
What's the difference between fruit and a freshly killed corpse?
I don't eat the fruit.
What do you call a clock on a belt?
A waist of time.
Jack: Hey Josh!
Josh: What?
Jack: Sex!
Josh: Huh?
Jack: SEX!!
Josh: I don't get it.
Jack: Exactly ;)