Whats jokes
What do you call the woman that fucked sooooooo many hunks to have the condom break and a failure to be born? Ur Mum.
What are an orphan's favorite shoes?
White Vans.
What's Elizabeth Warren's nickname?
Pocahontas
What do you call an orange on a small stick?
Donald Trump.
What is a pirate's favorite element?
Argon.
Three Europeans come to America. They all get captured by Native Americans, who want to kill them. However, the Europeans beg to have their lives spared. The Native Americans agree not to kill them on one condition: the Europeans must go into the forest and bring back a fruit, and they will be informed what to do with it.
The first guy comes back with a peach. The Native American says, "Shove it up your ass, if you laugh we kill you." So, he shoves the peach up his ass, laughs, and the Native Americans kill him. The second guy comes back with a grape. The Native American tells him the same thing. He laughs, and the Native American kills him.
They both see each other in heaven, and the first guy says to the second guy, "I had a peach and peaches are fuzzy, so that's why I laughed. But you had a grape, what happened?" The second guy says, "Oh yeah, I was doing just fine until I saw the other guy come back with a pineapple!"
What is the difference between the President of Ukraine and the President of the United States?
The President of Ukraine is a comedian, and the President of the United States is a joke!
Wanna know what my favorite feeling is? Warmth. Fuck, I left the oven on!
"Boiled ham" is what you call a dead Russian.
What do you call the most famous skeleton detective?
Sherlock Bones!
What do 9/11 and COVID-19 have in common?
I couldn't give a fuck about either.
What did the toilet say to the other toilet? "You look a bit flushed."
What's the difference between a mother and a father? The mother always comes back from the shop.
What does a clock do when he's still hungry? He goes back "four" seconds!
My dad told me to do what he did best, so I left.
What is a home that can fly?
A magic house!
What do Ethiopian people have better than Australians?
Internet.
What do you call a toy that has a story?
Toy Story.
What is an astronaut's favorite button? A space bar.
My friend says to me: "What rhymes with orange?" I said: "No it doesn't."