Whats jokes
What was the chip doing at the hairdressers?
It was getting a crinkle cut.
What's a delinquent mitten's favorite sport?
Badminton.
What did the Canadian say when a guy shot his beaver?
"It is ok, I forgive you."
What bathroom does a trumpet go to?
The brass room...
What do you say when a Spanish person loses a car?
Carlos.
what up
What's the similarity between a 14-year-old girl and the fetus inside her?
They're both thinking, "Oh fuck, mom is gonna kill me!"
What did Santa say when he saw a pretty girl?
HO, HO, HO!
What kind of shoes do ninjas wear? Sneakers.
What did one plane say to the other?
"It’s been a long day, I’m ready to crash."
Other plane: "No you’re not, we haven’t even gotten high yet!"
So a man asked another man, "What's your name?"
He says, "What's it to ya?"
So the guy asked again, "And he says what's it to ya?"
Come to find out his name was What's It To Ya.
What do cows listen to?
Moo-sic.
What was the winning play at the leper football game?
A hand off up the middle.
What comes next in the pattern, ottffs?
S, because it represents numbers going up: one, two, three, four, five, six, seven.
What does a Tusken Raider eat after his meal?
Some desert!
What is the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
When you slap a mosquito, it stops sucking you.
What's tall, has a twin, and is in Manhattan?
Nothing, Bin Laden destroyed them all.
What do you call a soda can’s dad? Pop!
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fffffsshhhhhh
What do pigs and ink have in common?
They both go in a pen.
What did the bull say when he went to college?
Bison!