Whats jokes

A man walks into a bar and sees a jar full of money, and he asks the bartender what's up with that jar of money.

Bartender says you gotta do 3 tasks. He takes the shot of Jack, and the customer says, "What are the tasks?" He says, "The 1st one is, well the 1st 1 is, I got about a 12' gator in the back that's got a bad tooth, and you gotta pull it." He says, "All right, what's the 2nd 1?" He said, "I got a big old girl upstairs that ain't had no loving in a long time, you gotta make her smile." He takes another shot of Jack. He said, "All right, what's the 3rd 1?" He said, "You see that horse outside, you gotta make him laugh and cry."

Guy goes upstairs, goes out back, comes out to the front, comes back in. The other customer said, "Give him the jar." The guy says, "I took care of that lady's tooth, and I made that alligator smile."

"Well how'd you make the horse laugh?" he said. "Easy, I told him I had a bigger deck then him."

Bartender says, "How did you make him cry?" He said, "Easy, I showed him."

Teacher: What do you kids want to be when you grow up?

Kid 1: I want to be a firefighter.

Kid 2: I want to be a police officer.

Kid 3: I want to be dead like both my parents.

Teacher: Ok, everyone pull out your books.

Kid 4: Are we going to ignore what he said?

Teacher: What do you want me to do? Call his parents?

What type of bow can't be tied?

Rainbow.

What is the difference between a Mexican and a bench?

The bench can support its family.

Technoblade says, "Punch an orphan. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?"

What's the difference between men and pigs? Pigs don't turn into men when they drink.

What's the #1 rule of kidnapping prevention?

Don't get carried away!

What happens when you find a bomb at your local bazaar?

It becomes a flee market.

What do you call a person in America that is not a retard?

A foreign exchange student.

What's the difference between a flower and an orphan?

One is allowed in the house.

What's a suicide bomber's biggest fear?

Dying alone.

What's the difference between the Twin Towers and an ugly woman?

The Twin Towers got fucked.

What's the difference between an orphan and a Chinese kid?

The Chinese kid has a home.

What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a pregnant emo girl?

The emo girl still bleeds.

What do you get when you put an ape's brain in a gorilla? A feminist!

What song can't orphans sing?

"Sweet Home Alabama."

What do Americans call high school?

Shooting range.

Why do orphans want to be criminals? Because they want to feel what it’s like to be wanted.

What if Stephen Hawking was the real Slim Shady, but couldn't stand up?

What do you call a AK-47 that lost 1 point?

An AK-46.