Whats jokes
What does Stephen Hawking eat for breakfast? His shoulder.
A teacher asked her young students to get their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it. The next day, the kids came back and one by one began to tell their stories. There were all the regular type of stuff.
But then the teacher realized that only Janie was left. "Janie, do you have a story to share?" "Yes madam... My daddy told me a story about my Mom." "OK, let’s hear,” said the teacher.
“My Mom was a Marine pilot in Operation Desert Storm in Iraq and her plane got hit. She had to bail out over enemy territory and all she had was a flask of whiskey, a pistol, and a survival knife. She drank the whiskey on the way down so the bottle wouldn’t break and then her parachute landed her right in the middle of 20 Iraqi troops.” “She shot 15 of them with the pistol, until she ran out of bullets, killed four more with the knife, till the blade broke, and then she killed the last Iraqi with her bare hands.”
Pin drop silence in the class!
"Good Heavens," said the horrified teacher, "What did your Daddy tell you was the moral to this horrible story?"
“Stay away from Mummy when she’s drunk...!!!”
What does the pedophile use for bait? Trix!
What's the best thing about 20-1 year olds... there's 20.
Two Native Americans
Unwittingly walk into a gay bar and sit down to order a pitcher of beer. As they're sitting there sucking back on their ale, a gay guy walks up and says, "How would you boys like a blow job?"
The one Indian stands up and decks the guy, knocking him unconscious. He then sits back down and finishes his beer.
His buddy looks over and says, "Hey Joe, what did you do that for?"
Joe replies, "Not sure but it was something about getting a job!"
Memes
What do you call an Indian lesbian? Minge-eater.
What's the difference between a Catholic priest and a pedophile? There isn't a difference.
What do you call two Mexicans having sex? 50 Shades of Brown.
What's the difference between a pile of 100 dead babies and a Mustang Challenger?
A Mustang Challenger doesn't exist.
What's the best thing about dead baby jokes?
They never get old.
What does Jonathan Davis eat for breakfast?
Korn Flakes.
What did Mother Mary say when God farted? Jesus Christ, you stink!
I asked this disabled kid what his favorite TV show is. He looked at me blankly and said "My favorite TV show is Vegetales."
What kind of file do you need to turn a 15 mm hole into a 40 mm hole? A pedophile.
What's a Mexican's favorite sport?
Cross country.
Somebody asked Rosa Parks what color the Skittles were, but she answered everything was black and white.
What is a cannibal's favorite dessert?
Brownies.
911 what's your emergency?
Me: Officer, my girlfriend is dead!
Operator: What happened!?
Me: She bit the tip.
What soda do mountains drink? Mountain Dew.
What is the similarity between an anti-joke and a clown? Neither are funny.