Whats jokes
What's an orphan's favorite song? Gimme Shelter.
What did the kid with leukemia watch last night? Finding Chemo.
What happened to the alligator when he held a GPS?
He became a navigator.
What do you call an emo group?
Suicide squad.
Q: There were two tampons walking down the road the other day. Guess what they said to each other?
A: Nothing, 'cause they're both stuck-up cunts.
Roses are red, violets are blue, you know what else is violent? Suicide with me and you.
Q: What do you call 6 gay men in the army?
A: Rainbow Six Siege.
If you're born deaf, what language would you think in?
What's a rapist's favorite scale?
C Minor.
What do you call the worst joke teller of all time?
Ben or Chris?
What is Beethoven's favorite fruit?
A Ba-na-na-na! (To the tune of Beethoven's 5th symphony)
What falls first from a tree, an apple or an emo?
The apple... the emo just hangs there.
What did the autistic man order at McDonald’s?
Ass Burgers.
What is blue and wiggling on my floor?
A baby in a bag.
An old lady walks into an ice cream store. A clerk greets her and says, "What will it be today, ma'am? We have every flavor you can imagine." The old lady says, "Well, I guess I'd like a quart of chocolate ice cream." The clerk says, "Sorry, ma'am, we're out of chocolate today. Any other flavor we'll have." "Ok," she replies, "Why don't you just give me a pint of chocolate ice cream?" The clerk says a little louder in case she's hard of hearing, "Sorry, ma'am, but we're fresh out of chocolate ice cream." The old lady says, "Oh, ok. Why don't you just get me a cone with one scoop of chocolate ice cream?"
Finally, totally exasperated, the clerk says, "Wait a minute, lady. Can you spell 'Van' as in vanilla?" "Why of course, young man," she says, "V-A-N." "Right," the clerk says, "Can you spell 'Straw' as in strawberry?" "Well of course, 'Straw'," she replied. "Ok, then," he says, "Now spell 'Fuck' as in chocolate." She says, "There's no 'Fuck' in chocolate." He says, "That's what I've been trying to tell you... THERE'S NO FUCKING CHOCOLATE!!!"
What is wrong with the orphan website? It doesn't have a homepage.
What did the penis say to the condom?
"Cover me, I'm going in!"
Kid: Which were me, are your parents?
Orphan: What are parents?
What do you call a gay drive-by? A fruit roll-up.
What does a cow sound like when in a horror house?
Moo mooo moooooooo (screaming)!