Whats jokes
What? Gay
PURDGAY
What does Stephen Hawking have for food?
What is long and hard and is full of seamen?
A submarine.
What’s the difference between dark humor and morbid humor?
Dark humor is ten kids in one container; morbid humor is one kid in ten containers.
*on a date*
me - "I get to work with animals all day."
her - "How sweet! What do you do?"
me - "I'm a butcher."
What's both red, white and sometimes purple?
My arms...
1: My grandpa died last year.
2: What kind of cancer?
1: He was hit by a bus! It's called bus cancer.
What do you do if you're ever attacked by a gang of clowns?
Go for the juggler!
Asked my dad what LGBT stands for.
He started with "Lettuce? Bacon. Tomato. What's the 'g' for?" Obviously, I had to reply with "Garnish."
What's red and has 7 dents? Snow White's cherry.
What is 8 divided by 2?
Answer: 3 (you cut 8 in half).
What do trans men and Pinocchio have in common?
Both are lying when they say, "I'm a real boy."
Leo: Mother, what is an idiot?
Mother: An idiot is someone that explains something in a long, boring way so that the person that the idiot is trying to explain to doesn't understand.
Mother: Do you understand?
Leo: No.
What constellation has no hair at all?
Cancer.
What has more brains than a student in a school shooting? The wall behind them.
What were the last words of your grandma in 2020?
"Oh, I think I forgot my mask!"
What do you call a guy with a sandwich?
A guy with a sandwich.
A wife was cleaning her 12-year-old son’s bedroom when she found a load of serious bondage gear and fetish mags. She asked her husband, “What do we do?”
The husband said, “I’m no expert, but I wouldn’t fucking spank him.”
You know what the worst thing about gang rape is?
Having to wait your turn.
Orange: Hey Apple, Apple, hey Apple.
Apple: What?
Orange: Orange you glad I didn't say "Apple" again? Hahaha!