Whats jokes
Yesterday I asked my friend, "What is a fish without eyes?"
They replied, "I don’t know."
I said, "Fsh."
What did the man's dick say to the man?
I just can't "hand"le it!
What animal lies? A lion.
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
Lick-alot-a-puss.
What do you call a Mexican that lost his car?
Car-los
What do they say when they answer the phone???
What did the hematologist say when his Canadian patient wrote that he's blood type "eh"? "Ah, probably just go with blood typo!"
What's the difference between a gun and my will to live? None, they are both absent.
What do you call a country with nukes?
Abomination.
What do you call an overweight psychic?
A four chin teller.
Why can you punch an orphan and get away with it?
Because what is he gonna do, tell his parents?
What does the Fox say?
Fraka - kaka - kaka - kow.
Q. What is the biggest lie in the entire universe?
A. “I have read and agree to the Terms & Conditions.”
What time do you call me tomorrow?
Q. What's red and crawls up your leg?
A. A homesick abortion.
What is a bus ride that is dumb? A boring one.
What is the difference between a flat tire bicycle and a woman?
Answer: You need to pump the tire on the bicycle before you ride it, while a woman you need to ride her and pump.
Papyrus: Sans, can you call Undyne for me and tell her that I found a human!
Sans: Sure bro, lemme just get on the Tele-bone.
Papyrus: Ssssaaaaannnnsss!!!!!!
Sans: Yea bro.
Papyrus: You know what? I will tell Undyne instead.
What do you do when you see a naked dead girl?
Check your map, you're obviously going in circles.
What do you call an orphan's family picture?
A selfie.
One time the dog got bit by a snake, so my dad had to shoot it. My dad said to me, "This is what's going to happen to your little brother." "What little brother?" Exactly.