Whats jokes

Teacher: "Ok class, what animal jumps the highest?"

Kid: "A leopard."

Quiet kid: "No, it's emo kids. Some of them are still in the air."

Kid: "Broooooooooooo."

What kind of birds stick together?

Vel-crows.

What do you call it when you rickroll someone in the LGBTQ?

You just got fruit-rolled.

What does lmao mean?

Launch Missiles at orphanage.

What do Olympic sprinters eat before a race?

Nothing. They fast!

What's the only type of abortion Republicans will never try to legislate against?

A school shooting.

What does an orphan and a banana have in common? They both get split up.

"Lizzie Borden took an axe. And gave her mother forty whacks. When she saw what she had done, She gave her father forty-one."

What did Steven Hawking say when the WiFi cut out?.........Nothing.

Titanic walks into a bar. Britannic: "What would you like to drink?" Titanic: "An iceberg."

What are the wedding vows of a suicide bomber?

Til death do we park.

What's a book never written? Beautiful sights by a mountain, by a rocky hill!

What Spider-Man movie does an orphan like? Homecoming.

What does a depressed person and a jacket have in common?

They’re both hanging in the closet.

What did one butthole say to the other?

"I don't know WHAT got into me last night!"

What fits neatly into a hole, slides nicely between breasts, and if used wrong could choke someone? A seatbelt.

What is a cannibal's favorite type of pizza?

Domi-nose.

What's the difference between a trampoline and a dead baby?

I take my boots off before jumping on a trampoline.

What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a dead body? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

What type of cookie has an orphan never had? Home made cookies ;)