Whats jokes
What kind of car does Jesus drive?
A Christler.
What do an orphan's parents have in common with Nemo? They all can't be found.
What’s the worst song to play in front of a vegetable? “James Brown - Get on Up”
What’s the worst song to play in front of a handicapped kid? “Van Halen - Jump”
What's the worst song to play in front of a black man in Minneapolis? “I Can't Breathe - Juice Wrld”
What's the difference between depression and your ex?
Depression fucks you harder.
what's a depressed person's favorite game?
hangman
Memes
Today I feel diving. Today I feel penalty. Today I feel tap in. Today I feel ghosting. Today I feel finished. Today I feel a bench warmer... I know what it feels to be discriminated... I was bullied because I am Pristiano Penaldo.
A man sees a small boy begging for money. He walks up to him and asks him if he is an orphan.
The boy asks, "What gave me away?"
The man responds, "Your parents."
What do a school shooter and a lightbulb have in common? They both light up the classroom. 🤡💀
Me: *stabs vampire*
Wife: omg
Me: *beats vampire to death*
Wife: OMG
Me: What?
Wife: You're supposed to give them candy!
Me: Well, that's a sticky situation now, isn't it, Barbara?
Robin Hood [hands over stolen fortune]: here you are, my poor friend.
Friend: Wow thanks, I'm rich!
Robin [narrows eyes]: You're what?
What do you call a black person with a gun? Black ops.
What does a piece of gum and a gun have in common?
You pull one out, everyone wants to be your friend.
What's Juice WRLD's favorite place to shop at?
Answer: Forever 21.
Kid: Mom! You lied to me!
Mom: When?
Kid: You told me that my little brother was an Angel!
Mom: Sooo?
Kid: Then why didn’t he fly when I threw him off the balcony?
Mom: WHAT!!!??!!
Man walks into a bar and sees a bear serving drinks... Sits down looking astonished. The bear says, "what's the matter you never saw a bear serving drinks?" The man says, "it's not that, I just never thought the moose would sell the place."
What did the dick say to the condom?
Cover me, I'm going in. 😚😏
Q: Can orphans hit a home run?
A: No, they don't know what it's like to have a home to run to.
Old soviet joke.
"Who is your mother?" "Our great Soviet country." "Who is your father?" "Our dear comrade Stalin." "What's your greatest desire?" "Becoming an orphan."
What do you call pasta that’s made by a skeleton? A CREEPYpasta! (It’s my first one, lol)
A girl walked into a job interview. The interviewer said, "You are what we are looking for, but I need to test your skills." He hands her a pen. He said, "Sell me this pen." She puts it between her boobs.