Whats jokes
What do trans men and Pinocchio have in common?
Both are lying when they say, "I'm a real boy."
What's a pedophile's favorite fast food meal?
In-N-Out of kids.
What's a joke that an orphan has never heard before?
A dad joke.
What do you call a lesbian with fat fingers? Well hung.
What's the difference between a Palestinian and SpongeBob's Sandy Cheeks?
One is living in a bubble, the other one in rubble.
Hor- wait what the hell is that
What should you do if the dishwasher breaks?
Kick her.
What's the difference between a baby and garlic bread? I feel bad when I drop garlic bread.
What do Colorado and Saudi Arabia have in common?
It's legal to get stoned.
A gay guy and a trucker get in a car crash.
The gay guy says, "Somebody call the police! This man just rammed into me!"
The trucker says, "What the fuck did you just say, fucker? Get over here, I'm gonna wreck your ass!"
The gay man then says, "It's okay, everybody, don't call the police! He wants to negotiate."
Last Halloween, I went dressed as a woman. When I rang the doorbell, an elderly woman opened it, and I made a grunting noise and knocked the bowl of candy out of her hands.
She immediately called the police and told them exactly what happened. The officer pulled me aside and asked me a few questions. First, he asked if my parents were here, and I said nothing. Concerned by my answer, he then asked if I was okay, so I said nothing. He asked me what my name was, and I responded, "Hellen Keller."
What’s the difference between a school and an ISIS hideout?
I don’t know, I just fly the drone.
What's the most unrealistic part of Harry Potter?
A ginger with friends.
So, a doctor walks into the room with a dying patient. He looks the man up and down and says gravely: "I'm sorry, you only have ten left." The other man smiles nervously and asks, "T-ten what doc? Hours? Days? Weeks?" The doctor calmly looks at him. "Nine."
Doctor: You don't have long to live. 10...
Patient: Ten what? Ten years, ten months?
Doctor: 9... 8... 7...
What 3 words started Jeffery Dahmer's cannibalism?
"This isn't ketchup."
What’s the difference between a chromosome and a hormone?
You can hear a hormone.
Q. What did Hitler give his niece for her birthday?
A. An easy bake oven.
What's an African's favorite sport to play, but they can't? Water polo.
A man goes to the library to find the best book about committing suicide. So when he asks the librarian, "What's the best book on committing suicide?" The librarian said, "Oh, fuck off...you won't bring it back anyway."
What do you call a Muslim who owns 6 goats? -- A pimp.