What do you call a pregnant slave?
Buy 1 get 1 free.
Whats Jokes
Sonic says if you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
What's full of lard and is reserved as Putin's cannon fodder?
Your mum!!!
What do you say to an upset German?
Quit being such a sauerkraut!
What's every elderly person's spirit animal? The blue tang fish.
What do you get when you mix LSD and birth control? A trip without kids.
WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?
What do you call the ghost of a chicken? A poultrygeist!
What do orphans and apples not have in common... The apples get picked up.
What is the definition of auto masturbation?
Fellatio.
Hey Siri, what’s in my bank account?
You stupid shit, piece of elephant crap, you’re so ugly that when you were born, your nickname was bastard! You’re so ugly, that your crush fainted in front of you and was proclaimed dead! You’re so ugly that-
(Destroys phone cutely)
What did the parent say to M.J.?
"Get off my kid!"
What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable?
Putting her back in the wheelchair when you're done.
A weasel walks into a bar and the bartender says, “Wow, I’ve never seen a weasel before. What can I get you?”
“Pop,” goes the weasel.
What did the tree say to the depressed kid?
"Stop hanging around."
What do you call a router in a thong?
CISCO....(that thong thong thong thong!)
Friend: You know how I like my women like my coffee... hot.
Me: What if you don't like coffee? :(
Q: What did Darth Vader say to his smashed wristwatch?
A: I find your lack of face disturbing.
What do you call a fish with no eyes?
Fsh.
What's the most delicious city in the world? Hamburg.