Whats jokes
What music does a balloon listen to?
Pop music.
If Jonny ate 29 out of 30 chocolate bars what would he have? Diabetus. Jonny would have diabetus.
What do you call seagulls that fly over the bay? Bagels.
When Peter Pan jumped off the Twin Towers, what happened? He Neverland.
What do chicken on a plancha and emos have in common?
They both are hung.
What do girls and your hairline have in common? They are both receding.
Me: How do you celebrate Christmas?
Orphan: I don't know what you mean.
Me: There is no one to give a present.
What is the similarity between an orphan and the new Spider-Man movie, "There's No Way Home"?
Boy: "Why can't you get a family?"
Me: "Why can't you get a rope?"
Boy: "What do you mean?"
Friend and me: "We can show you."
Me: "I will tie the rope."
Friend: "I will push the chair."
What did the Deagle say to the G17?
"Son, you're rushing, but in some way, I like it."
What does every arsehole and Tory have in common?
They all produce horrible shit.
What’s green and smells of bacon?
KERMIT'S FINGERS ✌️
What do you call New York City?
A human zoo.
What is more used than plastic?
Hookers.
What's the difference between orphans and apples? Apples get picked.
What do Pink Floyd and Princess Diana have in common? The Wall was their last big hit.
What's braver than coming out gay? Taking a shit in an elementary school bathroom with those two kids that always mess with you and turn off the lights.
What did God say when he created the first black person?
"Behold, this specimen of divine integrity!"
What is one good thing about child molesters?
They drive slow past schools.
What's the second hardest thing in the morning?
The first hardest thing. 🍆