Whats jokes
What sandwich spread makes people itch?
Flea-nut butter.
What happened to the man who turned into a pistachio?
He became a shell of who he once was.
What happens if a cashew falls down your shirt?
It becomes a chestnut.
What did the peanut say to the cashew after their argument?
What did the peanut say to the cashew after their argument?
I'mma cashew outside!
What is sticky, but it cannot stick a stick?
The circular saw asked the chainsaw, "When am I as big as you?"
The chainsaw would answer with, "When you cut down some things in your life. Like your owner."
The circular saw would reply with, "What?"
I’m part of the anti anime association, but I’m starting to like anime. What do I do?
And for the joke: What do you call a dog with no back legs and a pair of metal balls? Sparky.
What do Rubik's cubes and melons have in common?
They have a history of separating colors.
What do you call New York City?
A human zoo.
What is more used than plastic?
Hookers.
What's the difference between orphans and apples? Apples get picked.
What do Pink Floyd and Princess Diana have in common? The Wall was their last big hit.
What does every arsehole and Tory have in common?
They all produce horrible shit.
What’s green and smells of bacon?
KERMIT'S FINGERS ✌️
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
What do you call a dog with no legs? No point in calling, he won't come anyway :(
What's braver than coming out gay? Taking a shit in an elementary school bathroom with those two kids that always mess with you and turn off the lights.
What do a Catholic priest and an Olympic silver medalist have in common? A: They both come in a little behind.
What do you call an orphan selfie?
A family photo.
My girlfriend told me that she wonders what our kids will look like.
No, they will be wondering what I look like.