Whats jokes
What's the resemblance between a microwave and human reproduction?
They both make a sound at the end.
What did one poop say to the other poop? What's the matter? You look flushed!
What is this joke?
What did the female dog say to the mirror?
Hi, bitch!
Ah, what's that on your face? Oh, I forgot, that is your ass. It's so ugly, you stupid-looking bitch!
What do you say when your brother has too many jeans?
"Gene-ious!"
What do you get when someone named Victoria falls? A Victoria Falls!
What do you call two skeletons dancing in a tin can?
Noise!
Son: I heard mom got stung by a few bees this morning. Is she ok? Hospital?
Dad: She's ok now, no hospital.
Dad: She had to take the deep penis.
Son: Umm...... WHAT!?
Dad: I had to inject her with an EPIC PENIS.
Dad: Oh for god's sakes.
Dad: Epi Pen.
If your kid beats up an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
One day I told a kid what 2 x 12 was. He said he didn't know. I said let's go to my basement and figure it out. He is still in my basement trying to do the equation.
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite shampoo?
Head and Shoulders.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef! Hahahahahaha!
My mom told me to get dressed, and I said, "For what? Are we going to the rodeo?"
Q. What kind of school does an ice cream man go to?
A. Sunday school!
Psst! Don't understand? Well, "Sunday" sounds like "Sundae." Get it now? Nope? Sorry. Plus, it's an ice cream homophone joke.
What's the difference between Madeleine McCann and a boomerang?
The boomerang is guaranteed to come back.
What did the bull say to the bullfighter?
What's the "matador?"
What do you call hot cups?
Sunglasses.
What does the beet DJ say when he's partying?
"Dance to the beet, y'all!"
What do you call a sleeping dinosaur?
A dino-snore!