What do you call jokes

Moon

Q: What do you call a "Wild Man" or "Wild Woman" on the Moon?

A: A Luna-Tic!

House

What do you call it when Portericans surround your house?

A spicket fence!

Day

What do you call the day before Christmas Eve? Christmas Adam.

Scarecrow

1. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.

2. Why did the melon jump into the lake? It wanted to be a water-melon.

3. What did the duck say when it bought lipstick? “Put it on my bill.”

4. What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.

5. What has a bed that you can’t sleep in? A river.

6. Why were the teacher’s eyes crossed? She couldn’t control her pupils.

7. What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? An Envelope.

8. How does the ocean say hello? It waves.

9. What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match.

10. What creature is smarter than a talking parrot? A spelling bee.

11. Which U.S. state has the smallest soft drinks? Minnesota (as in, “mini-soda”).

12. Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted.

13. Apparently, you can’t use “beef stew” as a password. It’s not stroganoff.

14. Why did the drum take a nap? It was beat.

15. Where do hamburgers go dancing? They go to the meat-ball.

16. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing.

17. Why shouldn’t you write with a broken pencil? Because it’s pointless.

Woman

What do you call that useless piece of skin that goes all the way around a pussy?

A woman!

Roman

What do you call a Roman with a pubic hair in his teeth?

Glad He Ate Her.

Animal

What do you call an animal with 3 eyes, 2 mouths, 6 noses, and 4 ears?

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  • Hooker

    What do you call a dead hooker?

    It doesn't matter, she won't answer you.