Water jokes
What do you call James Bond when he’s taking a bath?
Bubble 07.
What did the fish say when seeing his best mate?
"I sea him!"
Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
Their dad did not come back with the milk.
Girl, is your butt made of water, because it is tubig?
What is the king’s favorite type of precipitation?
Hail, of course!
What is another king’s favorite type of precipitation?
Reign!
A fly is 6 inches above water, and a fish sees it and it leaps out and gets the fly. Then a bear grabs the fish and eats it. Then a hunter shot the bear, and a mouse saw some crackers and then leaped on the cracker and ate it. Then a cat runs down to get the mouse, trips, and falls into the water, and that's the story of how six inches can get a pussy wet.
How does an octopus laugh? Buble buble.
I was shocked when I found out my toaster was not waterproof.
What did one poop say to the other poop? What's the matter? You look flushed!
Once there was a boat. Its friends said,
"It's time to come back." And the boat said,
"No way. I don't give into pier pressure."
How do you drown a Blonde? You put a scratch and sniff sticker in a pool.
What do you call people who jumped in the dam?
A dam fool.
Why do priests dunk babies in water at their baptism? Because it's important to wash your sex toys.
Why is the ocean so salty?
Because the land doesn't wave back! 🤣
Why was Wet scared of Water? Because he was the water.
How do you clean the ocean?
With tide!
Okay, so turns out the toasters are not waterproof...
A toddler was giving her daddy a tea party.
She brought him a little cup of "tea" which was just water, of course. After several cups of tea, her Mom came home. Dad made her wait in the living room to watch his little Princess bring him a cup of tea, because it was, "Just the cutest thing!" Mom waited, and sure enough, here she come down the hall with a cup of tea for Daddy. She watches him drink it up and then says, "You know the only place she can reach water, is the toilet!"
What’s the difference between Texas and Flint, Michigan?
Nothing; no one cares how much lead is in the kids.
Why was the Mexican scared of cold water?
It might turn into ICE.