Want jokes
Why can't orphans get five stars in GTA? Because they weren't wanted.
I told my dad that I wanted to go to a college with a 100% acceptance rate and a 50% graduation rate, and he said, "Your mom doesn't count as a college!"
Who wants to laugh about life with me?
My wife treats me like God!
She takes no notice of my existence until she wants something.
Why can’t you kidnap an orphan?
Because you can’t steal what was never wanted in the first place.
In the French school, four sentences must be written. Fritz heard his mother say, "Close the door!"
Fritz went to his uncle and heard, "Yes, I'll put it there."
Then he came to his brother who said, "They call me Superman, hahaha!"
Finally, his sister looked at a photo and said, "Wow!"
The next day, the teacher said, "Okay, Fritz, it's your turn. Finish eating and take out the trash!" Fritz said, "Close the door!"
The teacher got angry and said, "I want to see the principal." Fritz replied, "Yes, my friend, I am leaving you."
The teacher asked, "I have forgotten your name, what is it?" Fritz said, "I'm Superman! I'm Superman! You're nothing!"
"Who do you think I am?" asked the teacher, who had become very angry. Fritz replied, "Wow!"
I'm so frickin' bored! Please, somebody want to chat? PLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSEEEEEEEEEE!
It's quite ironic that people tell you "Happy Birthday," then they want to give you a spanking.
Why did the rapper become a plumber?
Because he wanted to lay down some SICK PIPES!
Yo mama's so fat, Darth Vader wanted her to be the Death Star!
Chalie has an eating disorder, and he is shorter, so is his life, but he will never get a wife. He's a gay motherfucker who wants to be hit by a trucker?
Three ladies were on a flight when suddenly the captain announced, "Please prepare for a crash landing."
The first lady put on all her jewelry. Surprised by this, the other ladies questioned her actions. The first lady replied, "Well, when they come to rescue us they will see that I am rich and will rescue me first." The second lady, not wanting to be left behind, began to take off her top and bra. "Why are you doing that?" the other ladies questioned. "Well, when they come to rescue us, they will see my great tits and will take me first." The third lady who was African, not wanting to be outdone, took off her pants and panties. "Why are you doing that?" the other ladies questioned. "Well, they always search for the black box first."
Roses are red. Violets are blue. Your wife needs Jon Grudon, too.
Do you want to know why they call it an orphanage? Because they couldn't call it orphans home.
Why do people play basketball?
Because they want to learn how to suck balls.
Being bullied by an artist? Want them to leave you alone?
www.VincentVanGoghAway.com
I want to die like my grandpa, with a blindfold and a wet sponge on his head.
Little Johnny was walking down an alley and saw a lamp. After he rubbed it, a genie came out and said, "You have 10 seconds to have one wish." Little Johnny says he wants to pee alcohol. The genie grants his wish. He tells his family, and his sister doesn't believe it. After having a drink, she says, "We should have this every night!" Little Johnny gets two cups every night, one for him and his sister. He does the same thing for four nights. Eventually, he ran out of cups and has one left. He gives it to himself, and his sister asks, "Where's my cup?" Little Johnny replied, "You're drinking out of the bottle tonight."
Someone asked me why I'm still here... the answer is simple: I don't want to be used as a school assembly.
Why do orphans play GTA? Because they can’t be wanted.