Want jokes
Me: Mom, the weight scale wants your weight, not your phone number!
My friend asked me if I wanted to hang out by the tree later. I said, "Yeah, I was gonna hang there."
Why do orphans kill people so they can finally be wanted?
"Give it to me! Give it to me!" she yelled. "I'm so wet, give it to me now!" She could scream all she wanted, but I was keeping the umbrella.
What do we want? Racecar noises!
When do we want them? NEOWWWWW!
Memes
A little girl was sitting with some other kids. She thought to herself, "I want to have kids when I'm older, at least they’ll have a home, parents, and hopefully a dad that actually came back with the milk!" 🤣😂
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to go to KFC.
This emo kid wanted to join a group of emos, but he didn't make the cut.
Why did the orphan rob the bank?
He wanted to be wanted.
What starts with a P and ends in S? (hint: men have it and women want it). Pockets.
What do you not say to an Emo if you want them to come round? "Wanna hang out."
My gay ass: I want to find Jesus.
Religious mom: FINALLY!
Me: Grabs a noose.
Mom: I'm getting you a dog!
Me: OMG REALLY?!
Mom: Yeah, what gender do you want?
Me:...
Me: Bitch, please.
"911, what’s your emergency?" I asked, listening to the quiet sobs of a little kid on the other end of the line.
“I think my daddy want to kill me,” the girl said and cried, making me freeze on the spot as I recognized my daughter’s voice.
Was invited to the inauguration of an I-pad.
We were all ready to begin the event. I was supposed to cut the ribbons, but before I could do that, Penaldo jumped outta nowhere and shouted, "I DON'T WANT I-PAD, I ONLY WANT TO STATPAD!"
Shame on Penaldo for ruining the event! 😡
I was in a motivational seminar about depression the other day, and she said I could be anything I wanted to be if I put my mind to it. Sometimes you just have to bite the bullet and do it, even if it's messy.
Yo, hairline been missing so badly that the police had to put up a wanted poster for it!
I always keep anti-fungal spray with me... because I don't want to share my girlfriend with anyone.
Why did the orphan commit crimes? To know what it's like to be wanted.
I wanted another piece of pizza... but she said I could only have One Piece.