Want jokes

Are you a trampoline? Because I want to bounce on you.

The brain named itself, and when the brain realized that it named itself, it was surprised.

But maybe, it was a spelling mistake and the brain wanted the name Brian. We all have a little Brian in us!

I was digging in my garden when I found this chest of gold coins.

I wanted to run inside to tell my wife what I found, but that's when I remembered why I was digging.

What do guns and gum have in common?

When you pull one out, everyone wants to be your friend.

Two people wanted pepperoni pizza... Sadly, they got planes.

Do you want to know how the NY Jets got their name?

My wife wanted something that went from 0 to 80 very quickly.

So I brought her a new bathroom scale.

A Roman walks into a bar and asks for a Martinus.

"Don't you mean a martini?" asks the bartender.

The Roman replies, "If I wanted a double, I would have asked for one!"

Every depressed person just has to say, "I WANT TO JUMP OFF THAT TALL BUILDING RIGHT THERE!" and then points to the building and runs up to it like an immature child, and then they get disappointed when they aren't allowed into the building.

What’s something you can say in bed and in a Zoom meeting?

"Do you want the cameras on or off?"

Why did the rapper bring a ladder to the concert?

Because he wanted to reach new heights in his performance.

Is there a racist jokes page here? I’m not racist, I just want to know.

Yo mama so fat that when she went to the fatty competition, they said no because they didn't want professionals.

(Just a joke, she's probably kind.)

I killed 5 orphans and tried to sell their organs.

Nobody still wanted them.

TJ's hairline is so far back, his friends don't even want to talk to him.

TJ's hairline is so far back his friends don't even want to talk to his ugly ass!

The north tower wanted some salted fries at Burger King.

They were plane as usual.

There was a girl called Millie, and she had sexy blond hair, and she wanted to chase me, but I told her she had to catch me first if she loves me.

Why do orphans rob banks?

Because they want to be wanted.

You want to know why Santa brings such a big sack?

Because he only comes once a year.