Visit jokes

How does a disabled man go to church? He can't, there's no ramp.

Helen Keller walked into a bar, and a table, and chairs.

Why did the library book go to the doctor?

It needed to be checked out.

Why doesn’t Helen Keller go to the optometrist?

Because she’s dead.

This is the real reason why the chicken crossed the road.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?

A: To visit his grandmother at KFC.

Why did Mexicans go to Area 51?

To show them what a real illegal alien looks like.

What did the comedian say when he walked into a bank?

"This is a stand-up."

When a family friend passed away, my granddaughter took her three-year-old son to visit the widow. As they approached the front door, she whispered to the boy, “Make sure to tell her how sorry you are.” He whispered back, “Why? I didn’t kill him.”

My dad came over late at night. He was drunk. He started telling me how useless I was. Then I went to the kitchen, grabbed a knife, and stabbed him in the chest 47 times.

Three minutes later, he died. Now I’m losing my mind and cutting myself.

Two men walked into a bar, and one man asked for H20, and the other man asked for H20 too.

Only one man came out alive.

Why does an orphan love to go to church?

Because they have someone to call father.

When meeting her parents doesn't require you to leave the house.