Virgin jokes
Jesus got rejected. A few years later he died. He came back just to lose his virginity because even Jesus is not a fucking cunt.
Get off this site and go have some sex, you fucking virgins.
Three doctors go into a room to get rid of a dead guy's body. They notice when they walk over that he has a boner. The first doctor decides, "Why not fuck him? He still has a boner left in him." The second says, "Well, he's dead, and I am a virgin." The third one says, "I can't, I'm on my period," and then says, "Okay, why not? He's already dead. It's not like he doesn't smell bad." After all that, they go to walk out, and the guy pops up and says, "Thanks for saving my life, pumping blood back into my body..."
Comic: God, you're a fuckin' virgin, aren't you?!
Gerald: No! I've been 'round the block loads of times; women practically drool over me.
Comic: Yeah, and the Archbishop of Banterbury, mate. A name like Gerald, and with added 'four eyes' like them shit pair of glasses from FOUR EYED SPECCY INSTITUTION, mate, the only woman your dick has been in was when you were inside your mom's womb.
"You get no bitches," said the man to the 60-year-old redneck virgin guy who is obese and balding with "Trump" stuff plastered all over his pickup truck.
Why do Vampires like virgins?
Because eating a sandwich would be so much more appealing knowing no one fucked it.
Are you still a virgin?
If you do IT
With no one?
Friend A: "Why are you still a virgin, bro?"
Friend B: "I was until last night."
Friend A: "Nah, nah, who with?"
Friend B: "Your sister."
Friend A: "I don't have a sister."
Friend B: "Just wait 9 months, you'll see."
Welcome to our Computer Show.
I'm Mars Argo.
Welcome to youtube.com.
Calculate my dick, virgins!
Son to mother: "Mom, all the kids in the school are making fun of me because I am still a virgin."
Mother: "Well, start giving them bad grades, and they will stop."
God damn it. Fuck Christianity. I'm fucking 30 years old and still a virgin.
THAT'S A JOKE GOD DAMMIT!
What is a redneck virgin?
A seven-year-old that can run faster than her brothers.
The Virgin Mary wasn't a virgin; she was a prostitute. God raped her.
What do you call a baby that came out of their mother's womb? A virgin.
All the Muslims are pissed off because 24 hours after Chuck Norris went to heaven there were no more virgins left.
Why can you never find a virgin cow on a field with no bulls for miles? Just ask the redneck farmer.
A virgin is what I called my daughter before I took that away from her.
What is the difference between Sir Isaac Newton and the baby I just stabbed?
Sir Isaac Newton died a virgin.
Genie: You cannot wish for more wishes, immortality, or love.
Man: I wish not to die a virgin.
Genie: I just said no wishing for immortality!
The best night of my life was when I gave my virginity to my wife, and her last word was when she called me "Mommy" at the top of her lungs before I knocked her up 😍.