Violence jokes
My therapist told me that time heals all wounds. So I stabbed him, now we wait.
What’s black, white, and red? A nun that fell down a 100 flight of stairs.
What’s black, white, and laughing? The nun that pushed her!
What is the difference between a rapist and a dictionary?
One of them knows the definition of no.
playing irl fruit ninja on my arm.
How many times does 43 go into 8?
Get in the van and find out.
No one.
I'd hit you, but I don't want to go to jail for animal abuse.
How are school shooting victims and school shooting jokes similar?
They never get old.
*Loud explosion inside the tank*
"Where's the commander?" "He's gone." "Where has he gone?" "All over the place."
Roses are red, my name is Dan, I have a gun, GET IN THE VAN!
What's a similarity between your best friend and a tree?
They both fall over when you hit them with an axe.
what is it called when an illegal immigrant is getting raped?
alien vs predator
What mental illness do terrorists suffer from?
Intermittent Explosive Disorder (IED).
How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb?
Must be more than 13, because my basement is still dark.
What's the difference between a feminist and a suicide vest?
At least one does something when it is triggered.
Q: What's the difference between rape and marriage?
A: With marriage, you get to keep the screaming woman afterwards.
Why is it that when women decide to kill an unborn baby, it's a "CHOICE," but when I decide to drive my F-150 into a playground full of kids, it's called "MURDER"!
Did you hear about the school shooting joke? Well, I won't tell you it's aimed at a younger audience.
What leaves a bigger memory than a passionate kiss?
A stab wound.
How many police officers does it take to change a lightbulb?
None. They just beat the room for being black.
You find yourself stuck in a hole with a murderer, a rapist, and a lawyer. You're armed, but you only have 2 bullets left. What do you do?
Shoot the lawyer. Twice.