Violence Jokes

If you’re bored, punch an orphan.

What are they gonna do, tell their parents?

I suck on cups so START RUNNIN' CUPHEAD!

Why did the serial killer let the guy in a wheelchair go? Because the guy didn’t really have any body for the serial killer to stab.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Bum.

Bum who?

Bum holding a pistol!

Why did the little girl cry twice?

Because you wiped your shitty bloody duck on her favorite teddy bear.

A dark green chalkboard with white text, 'I WILL NOT KILL MY CLASSMATES,' written repeatedly. The last line, 'I WILL KILL MY CLASSMATES,' is splattered with red, like blood.

What does a wife and a boombox have in common?

They only work when you beat them.

If you're ever bored, just punch an orphan because what are they gonna do? Tell their parents?

How fast did Little Sally paint the barn red?

As soon as the bomb exploded on her.

Here’s what I did to the kids at the orphanage. I dropkicked 12, lit 10 on fire, comboed 9, punched 3, and murdered 1.

My Dad keeps beating me and my mom. Please call the police. My name is Jacob Upchurch.

What is scarier than a pile of dead babies?

The bottom one ate its way out!

My wife told me to give her 8 inches, so I had to have sex with her 4 times and punch her in the nose.

When she says she wrestles, so you pull out your dick and she punches it.

I need to go to the hospital because I'm getting shot by a PUN.

POV: You're at school and you just enjoy your day.

Now once you found a bully and he said, "I will burn you in fire," then you just punched him out of the school and got detention. You escaped and walked home, but the bully came and ROASTED you. He threw you in the garbage, but you took off his clothes and even his underwear. You escape the bin and took a shower and had a good day after.