Vehicle jokes
What’s the difference between a Ferrari and a sack of dead babies?
I don’t have a Ferrari in my garage.
What's Yellow and can't swim?
A bus full of dead babies.
Q) What did the airplane say to the little boy?
A) Nothing, airplanes don't talk!
Where do leg amputees go to buy a car?
IHOP
What is the skeleton's favorite car?
A Zam-bone-y.
I had a dream about a car, and I woke up exhausted.
What is the difference between a human and a tree? A human can walk and you can drive.
What is a dog that you can drive?
A big doggy car.
Why did the car fall asleep?
Because he was too tired.
What is the difference between a human and a magic car 🚗?
A magic car can fly, and a house 🏡 cannot fly.
A cop pulls over a carload of nuns.
The cop says, "Sister, this is a 55 MPH highway. Why are you going so slow?"
The Sister replies, "Sir, I saw a lot of signs that said 41, not 55."
The cop answers, "Oh, Sister, that's not the speed limit, that's the name of the highway you are on!"
The Sister says, "Oh! Silly me! Thanks for letting me know. I'll be more careful."
At this point, the cop looks in the backseat where the other nuns are shaking and trembling. The cop asks, "Excuse me, Sister, what's wrong with your friends back there? They are shaking something terrible."
The Sister answers, "We just got off Highway 101."
I know a Chinese joy rider, Tommy Tookamotor.
What’s yellow and can’t swim??
A school bus with elementary kids.
You're the bus driver. The bus driver picks up twenty kids, drops two, picks up eighty. Drops seven, picks up a woman with green eyes, drops off a man with blue, kicks a kid in the face, and buried his mother.
Who's the bus driver?
You will never nose [know].
Why did the bike fall over?
Because it was two tired!
What’s long, yellow, and doesn’t float?
A school bus filled with children.
What is the difference between a human being in the car?
What did the bus driver say to the car?
"What is your address?"
How does a blonde turn off the light after having sex?
She opens the car door.
Mosely in a white van.