Ur jokes

Strap

4 views ·

You're walking into a bar and you see 2 younger kids around 18. You call the manager to have them removed, but no one came down.

Later that night, you see the 2 18-year-olds, 1 was a girl and the other was a boy, so you call the manager down. No one came again. You confront them and tell them to leave, but one turns around and hits you. You are knocked out on the floor. When you wake up, there is a hard feeling in your a**. You turn your head around and there is an autistic girl with a strap-on in your a** going full on hard.

Bus Driver

1 view ·

You're the bus driver. The bus driver picks up twenty kids, drops two, picks up eighty. Drops seven, picks up a woman with green eyes, drops off a man with blue, kicks a kid in the face, and buried his mother.

Who's the bus driver?

You will never nose [know].

Ball

Why did your dad FUCKING LEAVE YOU? He went to suck balls.

What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball?

She gagged.

Face

7 views ·

George, when I saw your face, I had to shoot you with a Nerf gun. If you died, wimp.

Player

What do Call of Duty players say when they shoot up a school?

654-721-8940

(If you understand the joke, you're a god.)

Post

4 views ·

Does anyone have an Xbox One? My gamertag is Chalkyfrog11. Add me and comment on this post telling me your gamertag.

Mirror

9 views ·

If this is offensive to anyone, I'm sorry! Hey, wanna see something funny? Go look in your mirror!

Man

A man walks into a forest and sees a girl crying. He asks her, "What is wrong?"

She replies, "I lost my family, my friends, and my home."

The man then unties his pants and says, "Then young lady, your day is about to get worse!"

Boy

2 views ·

Someone telling a joke:

Boy: "My parents are dead."

Girl: "My grandad is too."

Orphan who listened to it: "That joke is dead!"

Person who told the joke: "So is your family!"

Son

1 view ·

Rhydon- son.

Rhydon? - mum.

RHYDON DEEZ NUTS! - son.

Jeez, ur like ur father in bed- mum.

XD