Ups jokes

Hey y'all, you want to read something funny? Then look up "Greater Tuna" OID and read the script. It's the best. I'm performing it for an OID (Oral Interpretation of Drama) and it kicks ass. Check it out. Also, the name I'm using is my Roblox Username. Friend me.

So, I walked up to my grandma and I said, "What color would you be on a rainbow cupcake?" She just turned 61, ok, ok. So I'm like, "I got it, I got it, ok, ok." She's like: "Ok, what color?" I say: "Grey."

Q: Why do Skeletons hate the cold?

A: It sends chills up their spine.

Jimmy asks an elevator operator what he thinks of his job.

The operator shrugs and says, "It has its ups and downs!"

If your kid beats up an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?

"Is Mrs. Wall here?"

"No."

"Is Mr. Wall here?"

"No."

"Then what is holding up the walls?"

Eggs are so egg-cellent that they are sunny-side up.

You know what should give up and stay dead?

Fortnite.

Shut the hell up with all these Stephen Hawking jokes, hahah. I wanna kms.

Why did the biology teacher break up with the physics teacher?

Because there was no chemistry...

I fucked a chick named Macy, but she had dyslexia.

So I ended up doing the YMCA.

Walk up to an adopted kid and ask this, "How's your biological parents? Are they well?"

A guy walks up to me and says, "I wonder if the hookman is real?"

I reply saying, "Yeah, it's Asa Hutchinson, lol."

Yo, Rob, you forgot to pay me cause you sucky sucky my thang.

AKA, you're up for adoption.

A man wakes up and asks his wife, “Are you okay? You were cursing me all night in your sleep.” The wife replies, “Who says I was sleeping?”

Joe Mama so fat when she stepped on the sidewalk, I didn't laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.

I'd like to see things from your point of view, but I can't seem to get my head that far up my ass.

Pussies and tits have one thing in common: they're both made for kids, but men end up licking or suckling them.

If a gay male is married to a well-endowed, physically challenged gay male that has been sleeping in bed for three hours nonstop, and he wants him to wake up so he can fix him his morning breakfast, how does he wake him up?

Wake up sleeping Jesus by giving him a blowjob.

It's fucked up how people make these jokes, and when orphans read them, it makes them feel worse about themselves. I should know, I'm an orphan.