What has an N, an I, two Gs, an E, and an R?
GINGER!
You know I like my girls how I like my 9/11. Two twins that go down easy
A depressed kid was stuck on a tree, and a man saw the kid
Man: Hang in there! Im gonna get some help!
Two minutes later, the kid literally did what the guy said
RIP Daniel Kyre from Cyndago (July 6, 1994-September 18, 2015)
Daniel commited suicide five years ago today......
What's white and bloody?
Two doves in a trash compactor Talk about a failed marriage
Two fish are in a tank. One says, "You man the guns, I'll drive!"
Two men walked into a bar and one man asked for H20 and the other man asked for H20 too.
Only one man came out alive.
Two fish walked in to a wall one said to the other "dam"
Yo mama is so stupid she shoved two double A batteries up her butt and said, “ i’ve got the power “
Kid: Mum how do you know someone is drunk? Mum: See the four birds over there Kid: huh, wait a minute. Mum: A drunk person would see eight. Kid: Mum but there is only two.
What do 9-11 and a fighter have In common they both have a one two combo
At baseball practice... Hey John did you bring the bucket of balls? No but I got two right here
Two hunters were walking through the forest one day. All of the sudden, one of them passes out. The other hunter panics and dials 911. The emergency responder says “911, whats your emergency?” The hunter replies “My friend just passed out and I don’t know what to do! I think he might be dead!” The emergency responder replies “Before you do anything, make sure he is dead.” The phone goes silent and then the responder hears a gunshot. The hunter gets back on the phone and says “Ok, now what?”
Girl: Come Over. Orphan: I can't. Girl: My parents aren't home ;) Orphan: Just two things I don't have.
Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? - In case he got a hole in one.
A Roman walks into a bar
He holds up two fingers and says "give me five beers."
Two people just met. One said, “We should do some bonding.” The other nodded and said back, “Titanic.” The first just looked confused so the second one just said, “Sorry, thought that would be a good icebreaker.”
What's the problem with 9/11 jokes? They are just two plane
What do you do after your girlfriend with two broken legs dumps you?
Take her wheel chair, she'll come crawling back.
Two horses are standing in a field. "I'm so hungry I could eat a horse," says the first.
"Moo!" says the second.
Why was 6 afraid to go camping with 7?
Because 7 ONEted TWO bring THREE knives FOUR surFIVEal, but 6 secretly knew that 7 hEIGHTed him, and didn’t have beNINE inTENtions.
Read this out loud to yourself and it’ll make sense. ;)
