Turn jokes
A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were stuck on an island, and the closest populated island was 100km away. So in turn, they try to swim to the island. The brunette swims 10 km then drowns. The redhead swims 30 km then drowns. The blonde swims 50 km then gets tired so she swims back.
What sort of file turns a one inch hole into a two inch hole?
A pedophile.
When is a car not a car? When it turns into a driveway. 🥁
I nailed my Jewish girlfriend so hard, she turned Christian.
Two deer walk out of a gay bar. One of them turns to the other and says, "I can't believe I blew forty bucks in there."
Yo mama is so ugly, when she goes into a bank, they turn off the cameras.
Yo mama so fat she sat on an iPhone and turned it into an iPad.
What is the difference between a Catholic priest and acne? -- Acne comes on your face after you turn 13.
Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar.
One turns to the other and says, "I think I've lost my electron."
The other asks, "Are you sure?"
"Yes," the first says, "I'm positive!"
Odo walks down the alley and turns into a bar.
How do you turn a dishwasher into a snow plow?
Give her a shovel.