Trump

Donald Trump Jokes

File

    • A kid asks Trump:

    Kid: "Where are the confidential files?"

    Trump: "There they are, bud!"

  • 1

    • Orphan

    • FRIEND: Hey, want to come to my house?

    LONELY ORPHAN/TRUMP: Want to come to my orphange?

    FRIEND: Dude, I'm blocking you!

    LONELY ORPHAN: :(

    Trump memes

    President

    • God- make a grumpy old man president.

    Angel- why?

    G- cause I said so-name him Trump.

    A- okay.

    G- make him not pay taxes.

    A- okay...

    Fast forward to 2020

    G- you know that grumpy old man?

    A- yea...

    G- make him create a deadly virus named after a beer.

    A- Krona.

    G- exactly.

    A- why do you hate humans so much?

    G- because I can.

    President

    • Biden: Shut up, Trump, disrespectful!

    President: You are the one with the inappropriate hair touching, bro. 😎😎😎😎😎😎

    Biden: -laughs hard because sloppy Joe can't do anything.

    Clock

    • I went to a museum and saw clocks. The owner told me these were lying clocks.

    "This is God's clock. It never moved because he never lied."

    "This is your clock. It moved 3 times because you lied 3 times."

    I asked where is President Trump's clock. He said it was at the equator, spinning super fast for those who were on fire. I laughed so hard because it was so true!

  • 2

    • Head

    • If Emma Feel had a penny every time someone gave her head, she would have enough to make Mark Zuckerberg and Trump her third-legged bitch.

    Wall

    • Why does former president Donald J. Trump still want the Mexican government to help him to build a wall to keep them out because he is a Christian nationalist on steroids?

  • 1

    • Helicopter

    • There were four people in a helicopter: Trump, a first-grade kid, a schoolteacher, and the Chinese leader.

    There were only three parachutes. The Chinese leader takes one and jumps. The schoolteacher says she has to teach, so she jumps. Trump and the first-grader are left. Trump says, "I've lived my life; you take the last one." So the kid puts on his backpack and jumps. Trump makes it out safe.

    Debate

    • People are really upset with the Trump-Biden debate.

    So much so, that Chris Wallace has requested to change his name.

    Drink

    • Trump goes to a bar and sees Hillary Clinton. He goes up to her and says, "Buy me a drink." She replies angrily, "Get your own drinks. What kind of a man asks a woman to buy him a drink?" Trump responds, "The kind that will grab you by the p***y."

  • 0

    • Donald Trump

    • Why is Donald Trump like a creamsicle?

    He's white on the inside.

    He's orange on the outside.

    And then there's that stick!