Travel jokes
Yo, if Russia comes to the USA, just know their reboot cards don't expire.
I was on a flight to California, but my next in the Empire State Building.
Why was the train late?
It kept getting sidetracked.
"Water exists."
Airport security: "What the fuck did you just say?"
If you’re American when you go in the bathroom...
... and American when you come out, what are you in the bathroom?
European.
I hope you SEA me around later, 'cause I SHORE won't stay here for long.
Why did the steward not receive his passport? Because his face was not valid!
A lesbian couple and a gay couple are going to San Francisco. Who made it first?
The lesbian couple got there lickety-split.
The gay couple was still packing their shit.
There were four people who went to land... only three returned... Why?
They left someone for memories!
You are recently injured because of your job as a driving instructor, so you couldn't go on vacation with your friends.
Your friends tell you that they have an Asian pilot.
You realize, "They have a -1% survival rate!"
Time flies by, doesn’t it?
But the plane in 9/11 didn’t.
My grandmother made her passage on a boat. The thing wasn’t the only thing that went down.
Why are there no Africans on cruise ships from Africa to America?
Once again, they don't fall for the trick!
A gay couple and a lesbian couple are going on a cruise. Who gets there first?
Obviously, the lesbian couple; they got their lickety-split. The gay couple was still packing their shit.
I wonder if Kobe Bryant enjoyed his last flight.
What's the difference between MH370 and my dad?
Both disappeared, but one killed 239 people.
How do flat-earthers travel?
On a plane.
Why were the rappers late for their flight?
They forgot to pack.
Yesterday I purchased a world map and told my wife to throw a dart, and wherever it lands, I will take her. Turns out we're spending three weeks behind the fridge.
You live in the airport.