Worst Jokes Ever

I saw a robbery at the Apple store.

Am I an iWitness?

Bad Hitler puns are infuhrerating.

When you're fighting with the emo kid and he brings his friends. Now you gotta fight the suicide squad.

Why do orphans become criminals? Because they want to know what it's like to be wanted.

Male Patient: So I just pull my pants down and bend over for my prostate exam.

Doctor: Yup.

Male: Ok I'm ready....hey doc that doesn't feel like a finger.

Doctor: He he yeah...im not a doctor.

If Shaq had a boat, he would name it "Freethrow," because he would never sink it.

I gave a blind kid a pistol and said it was a hairdryer.

Why do we not have female magicians? Because last time we had them, we burned them alive.

A man comes home and hears his wife talking about having sex at the club. The man busts into the club with a revolver and says, "WHO TF FUCKED MY WIFE?" Well, everyone looks over and is quiet, and someone in the back says, "Mate, you don't have enough bullets."

In death, what is the only organ in a woman's body to remain warm?

My dick.

Like if you love food!

What do the twin towers and my ex-girlfriend have in common? They both went down on my dad.

After my wife died, I couldn't even look at another woman for 10 years.

But now that I'm out of jail, I can honestly say it was worth it!

I googled "How to start a wildfire." I got 48,500 matches.

Who are the fastest readers?

911 victims. They went through 88 stories in 7 seconds.

I got my COVID test today, it says 50. What does that mean? Also, my IQ test came back positive.

Watching the 9/11 documentaries, just watching a kill cam.

Why don’t orphans and Chinese kids play baseball. The orphans can’t find home and the Chinese kid will eat the bat.

Why did the emo leave the bar?

Because it was happy hour.

What do you call a piece of tech that acts emo?

Cutting-edge Technology.